Must we all be sexy and wicked sick?

I am so tired of the word sexy I want to scream!! Sexy's rightful home is in the brain and so far they don't make lacy push-up brain bras, although Dear Helen Hartman has made a lovely "bullet-bra bonnet" from a bisected football. Must I wear lingerie in public (although I sometimes do that), swan about with my eyes half-closed (I do that too), and talk with a husky voice, which I only do when I'm coming down with something nasty ("Oh, Doctor, she has a bad case of wicked sick Sexy") or when I'm trying my hardest to be uber-cool and end up sounding uber-stupid, to qualify as sexy by mainstream standards?

So I surrender to sexiness. My Visible Monday outfit today at Patti's Not Dead Yet Style, as below, is not only uber-sexy, but it's also a wickedly-ill seasick ensemble of red, purple, pink, and orange.

Whose heart would not beat faster at the sight of this bright floral-patterned maxi dress with clashing pantyhose-fabric neon-pink top and hat? Of course my amour-red beret is keeping a lid on all that exploding brain sexiness - I wouldn't want it just spewing out at innocent bystanders on the sidewalk. And the wickedest sick part of today's outfit is the Heart bag, which I have had for a while but don't often use because the shape is very inconvenient and I have to carry a shopping bag to hold most of my sexy accoutrements, like pencil crayons and my reading glasses. I was going to wear something conservative, but then my overwhelmingly ill outfit compelled me to enter this forbidden Garden-of-Eden post-apple sinscape of sexiness.

Details of the outfit

• thrifted maxi dress with ruffles removed, Wildlife Thrift Store
• thrifted red beret, Community Thrift Shop
• thrifted red shoes, Hush Puppies, Value Village
• thrifted heart bag, Community Thrift Shop
• thrifted vintage neon-orange/pink sunglasses, Gastown shop

So a big Heart from Ms. Bag to everyone. Happy Visible Monday. Patti, you rock as hostess of your wonderful weekly party. This week I'm spiking the punch (more than usual). Of course I had a head schtart...hiccup.

My next post will (re)introduce you to 11 fabulous bloggers as part of my Liebster Award from Lovely Lyosha at Inside and Outside.

Sometimes simple is best on a trip to fake Paris

No shagariffic boots or bright colours here, but I feel just as visible in this black and white outfit as I do in my most brilliant plumage. This is exactly what I needed to wear on my stroll to my favourite cafe in fake Paris, or maybe fake Italy - does it really matter where? It's all in my head anyway. I'm putting this in Patty's wonderful Visible Monday at Not Dead Yet Style (even though it's already Tuesday). I've also put this up at Everybody, Everywear, which coincidentally has a monochromatic theme right now.

I'm looking rather dazed here, like a cat that has suddenly gone rang-y for no apparent reason. In fact, I'm feeling rather rang-y myself. 

TOO MUCH NOISE IN THE CITY!!! 

CAN YOU HEAR ME ABOVE THE DIN?? 

YES? 

THEN LET ME TURN UP MY FREAKING CAR STEREO OR 

RIP THE MUFFLER OFF MY HARLEY!!! 

Sorry, just venting here...effing, yeah! (heavy metal side effect)

The black things hanging down the front the outfit are the ties of the skirt. I carry a straw bag with this demure outfit and wear my other camera slung across my torso for style scouting. They're not in this photo because I needed to unburden myself as soon as I got home, which is when I snapped this. 

The Outfit

• wide-brimmed black hat, retail
• wraparound circle skirt, retail many years ago 
• flats, Geox, retail many years ago
• light cotton boat neck, three-quarter-sleeve top, thrifted, Value Village

This is the cartoon I drew of me in this outfit on my way to fake Paris (or Italy) with two of my favourite feline friends.

I'm including another outfit cartoon below. O and I had seen a marmalade cat hunting a dragonfly one night which I mentioned the next day when I saw Lisa at Dreamz n Wishz wearing fabulous firefly earrings, plus she had gone out for dinner at Firefly restaurant. She suggested that the cat might make a good cartoon. 

I was wearing Steven Madden slim trousers with ankle zips, and a shirt-dress, which Joni at Walking Colors had reminded me of, pointed black shoes, and my beret.

It has been hot here. By that I mean mid-20s tops. Compared to some places I should not be complaining, but I have been wilting terribly. No amount of watering is able to revive me. I have TREMENDOUS respect for all those bloggers weathering greater heat who manage to look so cool and fabulous, even in light jackets! I sleep sometimes with an icepack wrapped in a towel at my feet or under my neck, which helps. I hope it's not hot this week because I want to wear tights, but the odds are against me...

Other Housekeeping...

I drew this cartoon based on an incident that Curtise at The Secondhand Years had with Ms. Grabby Hands at a thrift sale. In the real story, Ms. Grabby TOOK Curtise's treasure. I could write a not-so-sweet heavy metal song about that too!

I sketched the cartoon below a while ago; it made me think of Robin at her blog a little sewing.

Okay, that's all. Whew. 

I hope you have a tremendous week! I've only been managing to post once a week lately, but I still make the rounds even if I'm not commenting as much as usual. You guys are all ROCK STARS!!!

My new heavy metal band in the Guvernment

Gentle readers, I have always been disturbed by the antics of profligates in the Guvernment, Toronto, and I took it upon myself to do a personal investigation - I went in. Warning: These images are not suitable for mature audiences.

This is what happened.

Mick, eat your heart out! I've always wanted to do this...

What better time than the present to start a heavy metal band? 

Who cares that I can't really play anything professionally or sing that great - I've never let a lack of talent stand in my way. In fact, in this case it's rather an asset. I don't like listening to heavy metal either, but I like what it is - serious rocking out like action painting with sound. At the last minute I conscripted a friend, Sandra, to be my band mate. She can't sing or play either (her words, not mine) so we're well suited, plus she is a true rocker chick at heart and already has the proper wardrobe and hair!

And I have to say...

THIS  IS  SO  MUCH  FREAKING  FUN!

I mean it -

THIS  IS  SO  MUCH  FREAKING  FUN!

Above are the photos from our very first rehearsal, July 27. We went in with no scores and no lyrics but it was better that way... I was planning on going alone to the booking, but when I ran into Sandra at the coffee shop before I left, I asked if she'd like to join me. She said, "Why not?" The rest is history. 

Neither Sandra nor I swear - I can't even WRITE swear words - but we can certainly SCREAM expletives until we're hoarse and bandy them about with calm logic as they pertain to our "lyrics." We are equal parts profane, rude, silly, and vain in the studio and we capture this in sound and through photos. Sandra is also a great  photographer - she took these shots of me.

Sandra brought refreshments to our second rehearsal, Friday. How thoughtful. Some lovely iced tea.

Oops, I carry my reading glasses in my tool belt (pocket on the right), and when I put them on I could see why this tea was so special. (Neither of us drinks in the studio - in fact I don't really drink at all - but it was a great prop!) 

Mag Ruffman, eat your heart out (very cool Canadian actor and handy-woman who had a TV show). Below is my Curtise pose!

Details of the outfit:

• leatherette hot pants with front zip, $5, Wildlife Thrift Store
• mustard tights
• thigh-high leatherette boots, belong to Sandra
• tool belt, gift, used as reading glasses holder

On the way to the studio I wore flats and a demure skirt over my stage wear.

"Songs" so far are below but I need a little more tutelage from O to improve my recording skills. I am on keyboards, which I manage reasonably unwell, and Sandra and I both do "vocals."

Songs so far:

1. We're going to the f***ing mall
2. We're two hot *itches
3. Have another look
4. She sure swears a lot

I suppose we're more of an abstract expressionist art project with lots of punk and heavy metal thrown in the mix. The point is to enjoy the process - any product that results is a bonus. Raw is best. After two sessions, we are both somewhat hooked!

We play at Soundhouse Studios, a new rehearsal space near downtown Vancouver with extremely reasonable rates. Each room is named after a famous studio from cities around the world - ours happened to be Guvernment. You should check them out if you are looking for a space. If you mention my name I get a discount next time we go. Tee hee! 

Have you ever dreamt of being a rock star? All it takes is 10 bucks for a studio rental for an hour (unless you're lucky enough to have your own place) but you'll come out feeling like a million. And hats off to the many people who have serious talent and play in bands for real! 

I'm linking this up with Patti's Visible Monday over at her fantastic blog Not Dead Yet Style. I certainly felt visible in this even if I only wore it to the Guvernment. What would you wear to the Guvernment?

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PS. A big Thank You to beautiful Lyosha at Inside and Outside for nominating me for a LIEBSTER AWARD!! I'll include a proper response in an upcoming post!!