Monday, 31 March 2014

Hat Attack 9, Stepford style, and Shop Secondhand First

I've been on the computer so much lately that my satin bow has become pixelated and I have turned into an animatronic Stepford wife! Thank goodness I could photoshop-out the power cable plugged into my head, which means I had better write this post for Judith's Hat Attack 9 (at Style Crone) quickly - who knows how long my brain's backup batteries will last.

"Gee, those moistened Q-tips work a dream at cleaning the venetian blinds. O will be so pleased. 
I can't wait to dust the lightbulbs and polish the bathtub drain."

Actually, being a Stepford wife would mean that I cook and clean and mend without batting an eye, when in fact I bat my eyes with great fury wearing these false eyelashes. It's the first time I've dressed up in fake lashes since I was about 12. I remember them clearly, Date Mates. Judging by my second photo, I don't think my gluing technique has improved since then.  

"Build me a pyramid and make it snappy"
Shocking non-Stepford behaviour! Clearly I am channelling strange energy from my green barrette.

This barrette was crafted by Kayla Gibbens, who gave it to Shelley of Forest City Fashionista for her giveaway, which is how I got it. Thanks, Shelley and Kayla. Shelley wore the same barrette in black and white for an earlier Hat Attack, here. I think this is one of my favourite head attachments - it's small, it's unique, and it's green; plus, it stays in place, unlike my hair which I teased into a stellar beehive that quickly fell flat, my fault for sparing the hairspray. I don't have a website for Kayla but if I get one, I'll let you know. (Edit: Kayla now has a Facebook page, Pxl Punk, so now you can contact her.)

Below is one my Stepford tricks for efficient housekeeping. I'm sure you can benefit from this tutorial on shirt-folding as well.


Oops, there's the timer for the roast and I still have to harvest my vegetables for the salad. Where's my extension cord? I'll never make it to the garden on battery power.

Thanks, Judith, for your hat meet-up. I'll activate the link when you go live on Tuesday.
PS - If I started acting Stepford, O would immediately take me to the doctor.

And this is what I wore today (Mon). This is for Bella's Shop Secondhand First link-up party at The Citizen Rosebud


My skirt is an oversized silk blouse with a scoop neck which sits quite nicely buttoned up below my waist. My hands are in my sleeves turned to the inside to form pockets, which creates a draping effect reminiscent of an Issey Miyake design. Everything here, except the shoes and tights, is thrifted. The short, heavyweight linen berry jacket is is short-sleeved. Flowing, flitty outfit, perfect for the springlike weather we are having today, 12C (54F). Flowers bloom on my legs.

Some of you may have seen this post without Bella's link. Horrors! I stand 100 percent behind her credo to Shop Secondhand First. Her featured blogger, Pao, is definitely a style and art icon for me too.

33 comments:

  1. Lol I love Stepford Melanie!!!

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  2. Cindy Sherman watch out, Melanie has the skills! Love this look and transformation. You have the eyes just right. The folding clip has a clever feel.

    blue hue wonderland

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  3. Stepford Melanie is a bit scary! I like the colourful shirt-skirt Melanie much better. That is one amazing shirt folding technique. I have a faster one. I take hold of the shirt in one hand, and toss it onto the shelf or stuff it into the drawer. Et voila!

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  4. Shawna, I LOVE your folding technique!

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  5. I had to watch that video three times to see how she did it. I think it was edited - it's a trick - it can't be that easy.

    I'm trying to think of tops I can turn into skirts. This is a brilliant idea, but don't put your keys in your pocket!

    You look stunning in all these pictures, but look gorgeous only in the last one - as yourself.

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  6. Ann said it, too. I was thinking Cindy Sherman only BETTER since Cindy has never even ONCE showed anyone how to fold a shirt. I tried it. It didn't work. I will NOT give up! Leave it to those Origami masters to come up with this.

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  7. you've got beautiful eyes! Glad I stopped by (from the blog roll on 40+)
    Alyssa
    alyssabarnettbeauty.com

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  8. Ooh, shirt as skirt - you are so damned clever! I love you with the crazy eyelashes on. You DO have that Stepford-y look (and yes, I have read the book, even the 70s book club edition!).

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  9. Your shirt/skirt is very Issey Miyake! Sleeves into pockets?! Crazy smart!

    However fun your hair bow is, it's your beautiful eyes that steal the show! Funny...I've been into Winners a few time over the last months and I always linger over the false eyelashes. I've never tried to apply them, and I'm sure I'd make a complete mess of it, LOL.

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  10. After studying the video I immediately unleashed my new skills on a 't' shirt....*10 minutes later*...I may need more help - 'Stepford' is a scary thing!
    Your skirt/top invention is just brilliant and false eyelashes seem to be as tricky as the shirt folding masterclass (for me too) x x x

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  11. I have stalked your blog for long enough. I just had to break silence to applaud your skirt inventiveness! Have loved the glimpses of Vancouver in your blog...we lived there for 3 years early 90s. Enjoy your warm balmy 12c spring! I'm sure your legs in flowered tights will immediately conjure the sun from...wherever it has gone!

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  12. Such pretty baby blues!! I want to try fake lashes, but haven't experimented with then yet! Wow, can't believe that skirt is a shirt--cool :)

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  13. you are a gorgeous S.F.! This is the truth: I actually did burn water the only time I ever "cooked" for my husband. But his shirts are folded damn well. Love this post, and your barrette, and your Liz Taylor too. xox.

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  14. Your eyes look incredible and that hair clip is so cute. It's like a photo out of a futuristic magazine from the 1950's. I fully expect to see a recipe for spam and jello mixed with miracle whip on the next page.

    bisous
    Suzanne

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  15. Stepford Melanie batting her false eyelashes, wouuauauuu!!
    love your headpiece, so cute!, and love your oversized silk blouse as a skirt, and that kimono jacket, everything is textured and shaped fabulously!, and your tights are awesome!!
    besos

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  16. I've been waiting to see how you styled the bow, and it was worth the wait. It looks great on you! I would make such a lousy Stepford Wife ;)

    I had been trying to turn a jacket/shirt that I have into a skirt and this post has inspired me to give it another go. I love the whole oufit, especially those tights.

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  17. You look utterly mad in the top photo - pretty, but mad.

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  18. I think you can't help but be mesmerizingly gorgeous, can ya! Thank you for linking but esp thank you for being. You are super stellar.

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  19. I think you were holding out on me when I saw you. All that time I thought you were, you know, The Mel that is arty and cool, smart and quirky. BUT A GLAMOROUS HOUSEWIFE?!! What do they say, a man wants an angel in the kitchen and a devil in bed? Whoa, you have pulled out all the stops again, AGAIN. I want you to teach me how to put on false eyelashes, pretty please? The lipliner I think I've got. Add some stilettos and I think I'm good. The problem is, I'll look like everyone else where I live and no one will get the irony.

    LOVE YOU!!!!!



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  20. Stepford wife meets Gray Gardens. Folding? Does that have something to do with ironing?

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  21. This is a first! A headwear repeat for Hat Attack! Worn by the fabulous Shelley and now the magnificent Melanie. I am unable to contain my excitement. Your Stepford wife rendition has me in awe! As does your thrifted ensemble. I must run right over to Bella's to check out the beauties!

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  22. That is a brilliant hair accessory! I am wondering I could recreate one with my hama beads??!! You look super in it!x

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  23. That is a brilliant hair accessory! I am wondering I could recreate one with my hama beads??!! You look super in it!x

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  24. that's the best bow ever! Love your blouse skirt. I've tried to do that myself but I just can't make it look right

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  25. Ha, don't go all Stepford on us, Mel, we don't want you malfunctioning like poor Paula Prentiss in the film...
    Somehow I don't think that will be your fate, can't see you dusting lightbulbs really.
    Wearing a blouse as a skirt, false eyelashes, and floral tights? Now that's more like it! xxx

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  26. Lovin' the whole adorned eye look...such drama and femininity!
    Your socks also are blowing my mind...I don't know how they work, but they do. You are amazing in your pairings!
    And then there's the "hat." Too cute!

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  27. Hi Melanie, well, you had me laughing . . . but please, please, please don't turn Stepford! We love you just the way you are :)
    Have a lovely and wacky weekend.
    Your blogging sister, Connie :)
    P.S. Stop cleaning, LOL.

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  28. just splendidly fabulous!! ooo and i have the yellow skirt and my post is up!!! x

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  29. Oh I like you as a Stepford woman... very pretty. Especially your eyes. gosh great eyes.
    Greetje

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  30. Love your pixelated bow! And you make me want to try false eyelashes.

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  31. that bow is too cute. Love the crazy makeup. I love how you transform into different characters with makeup, you're a true artist!
    The outfit is fantastic, love the volumes!

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  32. Congratulations on winning the bow!
    I now have a Facebook page for my business Pxl Punk https://www.facebook.com/pxlpunk?ref=hl, I hope to have an Etsy page up soon as well.
    Thanks for mentioning me in your blog.
    Kayla

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