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Sunday 3 July 2016

Complaints magic. And I'm on the cover of SheSpark zine!

When I go to my Blogger Reading List there is a little tab in the bottom right corner of the screen that says Complaints. Do you have this? I kind of wonder if this was added special for me by a sensitive company that would anticipate my needs in advance, like how a good hotel will leave a chocolate on your pillow. That's some good fecking service there, right?


Yesterday I clicked it for the first time. I know! - I have often wanted to open it when the sink gets clogged or a heel on my shoe crumbles or a lifetime lightbulb suddenly dies after one month. But I don't. I'm more stoical than that - I suck it up. But not yesterday.

I clicked it. Then, suddenly, man-god Fabio magically appeared in my living room, the man from the "I can't believe it's not butter" TV ads.


He fell to one knee at my feet and crooned, "Tell me your complaints, thou my goddess who summoned me." !!! Well, we got to talking and he ended up staying the night. When I woke up he was gone but I hadn't had so much fun since pyjama parties with my girlfriends. Which got me thinking: Blogger may be onto something here.

I immediately wrote to Blogger and they were so impressed by my enthusiastic response to their Complaints management that they had me test-drive a few of their new label additions.


PYJAMA PARTY : WRITE MY BLOG POST FOR ME : MANICURE : STYLE ADVICE

Well, as a style blogger I couldn't resist the Style Advice tab. I pushed it and, poof, there was Stacy London of the old show What Not To Wear standing dazed in my living room. WOW! I showed her to my closet and she peered inside. Then, wiping her hands, she turned around and said, "Sorry, hon. I can't help you here. Too bad our show went off the air," then, poof, she was gone.


Wow. Harsh! Right? Quickly I pushed the Complaints button. Over and over and over. But nothing happened. I tried Manicure for a quick pick-me-up and even Pyjama Party. Nuthin! At least Write My Blog Post for Me was still functioning, thank gawd, and I used it for this post. Let me say I'm not impressed!

So maybe it's better that they stick with just the Complaints tab in the end, but the next time I hope they send Mr. Bean. Fabio kept hogging the mirror.

Have you ever entertained a Complaint? Got suggestions for other tabs? If you're not on Blogger, does your platform have a cool function like this?


I'm linking this outfit up with Patti at Not Dead Style for Visible Monday and Catherine at Not Dressed as Lamb for #iwillwearwhatilike and Anne at SpyGirl for 52 Pick-me-up: Completion.

By the way, I didn't, I repeat, DIDN'T, get picked as a finalist in the H&M contest thingy. My entry was here. The entries of the five finalists are here. There is clarity. So who came up with that saying there's no such thing as failure? I think we need a tab called Blah Blah Blah. Which reminds me, where's my tab?: This is so fecking stupid so throw a party for yourself.


Oh, there it is! Heh. Come on over for drinks and cheese nippies! See? I don't like sour grapes; I like them fermented and dry. We're all WINNERS!!

A slightly better view of the pants below. I wore them mitten-clipped on the sides to make them shorter with black Converse runners. You can see a completely different styling of them here. And I like to think the former owner of this blouse enjoyed bowling, perhaps mini golf as well, as Shelley (Forest City Fashionista) suggested. I hope so. I adore this top.


And now a huge thank you to Suzanne Carillo for posting a photo of me with the BEST positive quote ever, along with a shout-out about my big, huge CBC Radio debut (heh) talking about Bill Cunningham. I could go on all day about how much I admired that man, even though I didn't know him. PLUS, Suzanne has been posting to my IG for me while I have tech issues. This is friendship beyond the call. xoxo
=======================

AND MORE BREAKING NEWS:
I didn't know if it would happen but I am on the cover of SheSpark magazine's July issue called "Own It!" It talks about self-image kick-starts for women over 40 in style, beauty, and wellness from a variety of angles.

Did you know that 54 is the age that women are least satisfied with their bodies?Yikes! In the section about social media you'll probably recognize many of the blogs mentioned.

Click on the image below to see the free online issue.

Mel Kobayashi on SheSpark magazine cover, July 2016
CLICK TO GO TO THE MAGAZINE

"Owning it" is definitely a concept I subscribe to in my style and I was honoured to be included as one of several over-40 Instagrammers. Go see who else is in there - I'm in excellent company!

SheSpark magazine is published monthly by Thea Wood and Audrey Stefanik. I must thank them for including me in this fantastic issue. We need more punchy magazines for over-40 women and I enthusiastically applaud their work and passion.

Okay, that's all. Heh. Finally. For now.


49 comments:

  1. WOO HOO...WOOOOO WHOOOOOO! Not just a supermodel, but a super cover model! Congrats Melanie. You are a role model to me!

    ReplyDelete
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    1. PS I don't have a complaints tab anywhere on my blogger reading list screen page...

      Delete
    2. They knew you are too nice to use such a thing, Sue, so they took it off your page. Heh.

      Delete
  2. I have a complaints button, but it says "Complain to Blogger". I'm afraid to click it!

    Those finalists are all rather normal (and young!) - I think you should have been in there, representin' for the creative oldsters. But wow, congrats on the cover - I'm off to read it right now! Jeez, soon you will be too grand for the likes of us! ;-P

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Mine is just plain "Complaints" which is rather all-encompassing. I bet few people use it because they are afraid. Which is great marketing: give them what they think they want and they won't use it.

      Yes, they are all young and gorgeous. I hope they all have stellar careers - with sincerity. I do think H&M should look around their stores. When I go in their store, there have been lots of women around my age.

      I love these little thrill rides - that's all they are. You can't get rid of me!!

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  3. congratulations!!! a mag cover! wow!!!!!!
    and a radio gig!
    well done my dear! and buh for the jury of H&M.
    wonderful ensemble of dotty pants and mini-golf blouse - some garments are made for each other.....
    now i´m off to search for this button!
    much love! xxxxxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Apparently some people don't have that button. !!! Only nice people don't have it.
      I entered the contest like a lottery - it would have been nice to go to New York. Sigh. But it's better to go on my own terms.
      Much love back, xxx!

      Delete
  4. Wow, how cool you look on that front cover! Proper catwalk model! That is very funny about the complaints button!

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    1. Not a catwalk. The face says, damn, I hope those onlookers get out of here soon! Thanks, Kezzie.

      Delete
  5. I guess you knocked the H&M competition right off the internetz. When I went "here" it just said ERROR ERROR ERROR. Damn right.
    Yes, I've seen that Complain to Blogger tab at the bottom of my screen. Wha? It felt like some kind of pass-the-buck google thingy to my suspicious mind. I never pushed it. scaredy cat, scaredy cat.
    Dare I try that CBC radio thingy again and see if I can get it to go backwards to where you start? Or is it just a futile effort for U.S.ers...or just me?
    Congrats on your good news that keeps on going. We're not worthy, I'm not worthy.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. I fixed the link, Pao. At least I think I did. All these non-working links, why? Why? Yes, there is a pop-up when I push it with a form type thing. Mine just says, Complaints.
      Yeah, that CBC thing. Puh. Some people in the US have said they heard it, but I suspect it's not reliable.

      Hahaha, I'm not worthy, classic Wayne's World. That's my kinda place.

      Delete
  6. How many times in the day do I hear myself saying that I need to throw a party for myself? AND that I want someone else to write my post?

    There is no way I'd have a complaints tab on my blog! That is just asking for trouble! Plus Fabio isn't my type. At all. You can't trust a man with that much hair on his head and none on his body. It's like an alien wearing a wig.

    It's a shame that manicure and PJ party didn't work. I would have loved to have seen who would pop up for those!

    As usual your posts are a blast! : P

    bisous
    Suzanne

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahaha, I agree with you about Fabio. Such an odd man, but he was such a success. How did he do that?

      I've never had a manicure. I wouldn't necessarily find that a reward-type activity. PJ party, it all depends on who's there.

      Thanks, Suzanne. I'm just trying to keep up to your wicked humour!

      Delete
  7. FUCK YEAH SheSpark!!!!!!!!!! They know what's up!!!

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  8. You are a Coverstar Melanie! Wow!
    Funny story about these great new tabs. :) In my list there is only one tab called "feedback" Pfff . I've pushed and complained that Melanie have more tabs than I !?! They said, yes she is a cover star and you are not! Bam! :))
    Wish you a wonderfull week,

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    1. Hahaha, Tina. You made me laugh. I wrote to them and told them immediately to send you more tabs. You are a cover star as well!! I hope you have a wonderful week as well.

      Delete
  9. Oh, I love this cover girl ;-). And I have no idea about these "complaints"... But I want to say "thank you" for your nice comments on my blog ;-). After two weeks with my daughter family I'm back here. Let's have a wondeful week - Ghislana

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, let's have a good one! Why not? Thanks for dropping by!!

      Delete
  10. What is the point of complaining? Constructive criticism is useful - but complaints are the universe giving you a sign to get up off your arse and ACT. No - not like on a stage 'act' (although complaining is a given for Drama Queens of the parish); take ACTION - or stop being the pub/bar room bore.

    The H+M thing - why get competition entrants to mirror-back your own look? Man Repeller are prolly gnashing their teeth furiously at the lost oppo to work with a kindred spirit.

    Your SheSpark cover - I have downloaded the issue to read after lunch - you, of course look beyond. And divine.

    Sincerely

    Elaine Monkeypaints

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Actually I haven't downloaded anything - but I have kept the viewing window open all morning!

      Bravo to such a positive attitude SheSparklers - this zine could chime for women of ALL ages.

      I'm glad I live in the UK where botox and cosmetic fixes are less commonplace (or at least less advertised). But then again, you can get a lot of fixing at the hair salon these days here, I believe - fillers botox-y stuff et al. Age is a privilege - not something to dread.

      I can't imagine a reticent life - but I can imagine how hard it must be to wear your colours on the inside, so as not to rock the boat. However, I do realise that a lot of folks are perfectly happy to run with the pack and not stand out. The important thing is to be free to do you - whatever that entails.

      Fark-on

      Elaine Monkeypaints

      Delete
    2. Being free. Yes! That is the most important thing. I am glad I live in a place that allows me to express myself! Man Repeller, I love her sense of humour. I would have liked to be a finalist just to meet her and, well, yeah, get a free trip to NY!

      Our dentist gives botox! But not hair salons, I don't think.

      I'm glad you like the magazine! Yes, viewing online is just as easy. I love how magazines can be posted online these days.

      Delete
  11. Ha ha, brilliant! Your posts always make me chuckle.

    My button says 'send feedback' I did use it recently, because my post wasn't showing up in the reading list, and then suddenly (minutes later) it was.

    loving your outfit on the magazine cover. Congratulations! ♥

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wow, you used the button and it worked! Whether by chance or not you got results. That is very encouraging. It IS magic.

      Thanks for commenting! I love when you visit.

      Delete
  12. 1) your outfit is fantastic. Such excellent pattern mixing. Such an interesting outfit.
    2) they were so right to let you test these marvellous tabs. I especially liked: "write my blogpost for me" and "manicure" hahaha.
    3) congrats with your cover. As I said before, your star is rising. Rising fast.
    And I don't have any complaints... Never had either.
    Greetje

    ReplyDelete
  13. Sometimes I have complaints, I admit it. But I try to do what I can to solve my problem on my own. It was strange to see that word though - Complaints. It implies whining. I would expect to see a button that says Report A Technical Difficulty or something like that. Oh well. It got my attention even though I never use it except to write this post. Heh.
    I'm glad you like the outfit - I was surprised how much I liked these two pieces together. And your comment about the rising star made me laugh - it's the best approach. Thanks, Greetje!

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  14. Cover Woman!! God you keep getting more and more fabulous, or at least more people are finding out. I am also using the "leave my comments for me" tab and it's really just cranking out rubbish. Love, love your look, xox

    Patti
    http://notdeadyetstyle.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahaha, I love the idea of trying a "leave my comments for me." Someone made an artist statement randomized writing app. Hilarious. Thanks for the compliment and the multi-million dollar idea.

      Delete
  15. Woop woop! Oh hey! I had that waist belt in black! I took it off at a steampunk party and someone totally stole it! Bummer!

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    1. Yeah, I get why they would steal it, but what a sleaze to do that at a party! I hope they had a horrific hangover the next day!!

      Delete
  16. Oh my gosh. It took me so long to finally post my comment because there was so much work involved. I had to click on little gold you. I,too, am a chip aficionado. And I had to read the magazine because my favorite model was on the cover!!!!! And I had to find out if I have a mid life self image problem. I do not. I have a mid life other people image problem. Then I had to check my blogger reading list to see if I have a complaints button. I do not. I have a "send feedback" button. So then I had to copy and paste to the "send feedback" my favorite Yelp review where I totally blast this creepy quack doctor because he is such an idiot that everybody needs to know. Then I went back to your blog where I admired your outfit for awhile. Then I had to Google Fabio because these days I just Google everybody. Then I had to recount the content of your blog to my husband and wax poetic on how much I love you and how you inspire me and crack me. Then I took a little lunch break. Now I'm back. I love your polka dotty pants. You are a living doll.

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    1. Connie, I suppose you are ready for the exam now? Hahaha. I think you may be in the minority with your reading. I always Google and check too and I never get anything done! If I were a doll I'd like to be the Brain Surgeon Comedian Barbie. Your comments always make me laugh. THANK YOU. xoxo

      Delete
  17. I want a "Cocktails" tab. Better yet, I want a "Cocktails Served by Fabio" tab. That jacket is a miracle. AND, yes! 54 is a treacherous age. Actually, all ages are treacherous, but for different reasons. Maybe it's all the same reasons, but we give them different names. I am THOROUGHLY enjoying being 60, however. I think I was born to be 60. It just feels right.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, why didn't I think of that? - the cocktails tab with Fabio. I love that you love being 60. I've never felt a particular age, except maybe 16 when I could drive. That was awesome! Thanks, Connie. Drinks, your place, Fabio will bring everything we need. Click, click, click!!

      Delete
  18. Kudos to you for the magazine cover, and the interview (you are ALL OVER the media lately). I don't recall ever seeing a complaints button on my bloglovin' feed before. Instead of "complaints", maybe they should have one for "Rants" 'cause I could certainly post a few.

    I saw in my feed that they selected the five finalists for the H&M contest, and as I suspected would happen, they are all in their 20's (possibly early 30's) and look like they spend a lot of time and money shopping. It would have been so damn refreshing to have seen you or Judith in there to mix it up. You'll always be a winner in my book!

    ReplyDelete
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    1. If they had a Rants button it would break the Net, hahaha, but I would have clicked it sooner than I have the Complaints button.

      Yes, H&M and Bloglovin' - we're not in their target demographic. I'm not really a "fashion" blogger anyway. Nor am I "breakout". But thank you, Shelley. You know you're a winner in my book too!

      Delete
  19. You are SOOOOOOOO a cover girl. I want to see you gracing all the glossies.
    I only seem to have a 'more gin' tab. So, will it work if I click it?

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    1. A "more gin" tab? I'll get a "more olives" tab and we can make beautiful martinis together. Hahaha!

      Delete
  20. I am SOOO MUCH a fan of yours! (I can't see a complaints tab on my blogger BUT trying to bring up this post of yours, the little blue circle kept spinning around and around up the top - obviously deciding if this was a wise move or not!) and what a fabulous post of colour, smiles and laughs all round. I am disappointed that THE SLEEVES dress didn't make it because I thought it would have nothing come close to it. And your cover photo - Wow!

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    1. Oh, Elizabeth, thank you so much for your head-inflating words. Hahaha. Your machine was right to spin those circles around. They just need those little spiral graphics inside them to prepare you even more for entering the zone. Heh. I looove those sleeves too, still do. But I guess it would be a good idea next time not to say of the sponsor brand "the garbage that keeps on giving."

      Delete
  21. Congratulations Mel! I'm sure that this is just the first cover-woman experience for you. You look fab, and I'm very excited for you.

    Hilarious post, as always. And you should have been one of the finalists in the H&M contest. What were they thinking!!!

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    1. I can't wait to see you on some big-timey cover, Judith!! That's would be AWESOME! Well, we both didn't win. If I were there we could raise a toast to being the best losing winners on earth. And eat yummy food. Thanks for being here.

      Delete
  22. hurrah for SheSparks, and hurrah for owning a sparkling style!!.
    Not so enthusiastic on that H&M contest, I think you deserve some big reward for your fabulousness wearing their clothes!!
    I would love to have all those tabs, and add some more by my own (I want an 'Accessorize like there's not tomorrow' tab). Obviously, 'Write my blogpost for me' is the best tab ever.
    besos

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    1. Hahaha, I love your idea of your tab. But I should think you don't need one. If anything, they would have to hire you and pay you big bucks to help everyone else's accessory dreams come true when they push that tab. Thanks for sharing your great energy here. It's a privilege.

      Delete
  23. so, not being a finalist is a good thing. Damn boring.

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    1. Hahaha, you say it like it is. Thank you.

      Delete
  24. Huh not a winner, I disagree, you made it on the cover of a magazine, I would say WINNER!!!!! Loving the tabs!!

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    1. THANK YOU, Sue! I must visit you right now!!!

      Delete
  25. Glad I came back to read this post - it is TOOOO funny! I'm all discombobulated by trying to do any internetty things on my phone. Are there tabs? Is there a Santa Claus?

    I noticed all the finalists in the H&M thing were youngsters. Hah.Wait till they're 54 and they hate their bodies. At 59 they won't give a f*ck!

    ReplyDelete

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