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Saturday 10 December 2016

The most amazing, stupendous, sponsored post EVER!

Look at those pants. Will you just LOOK at them?!!

When I first saw these pants, I couldn't believe that I might get to wear them for a blog post. Eeee! And then suddenly, they were mine! This is absolutely one of the best offers I have EVER had for a sponsored post. Ultra, ultra high-waisted, six buttons, screaming pink, blue, and aqua plaid wool palazzos. (Edit: These are probably what I would have described as "baggies" back in the day.)

And I can't get over how sophisticated and demure my response to this offer has been, despite my puppy-that-falls-over-and-pees-everywhere excitement. See? I'm calm, totally calm, serene even, freakishly so, acting like I get this kind of thing every frigging day! Case in point: so far I've used maybe 0.13% fewer exclamation points than usual in this post. Now that's control, right? The serenity that comes with success, dare I say.

I'm bummed that I couldn't do an outdoor shoot - not happening in the snow and rain, and there was probably hail too, and lightning, just to piss me off to maximum effect.

This kind of luxury item deserves the best location to do it justice, maybe a fancy hotel lobby or an upscale restaurant, or an art gallery even. But instead I used my black fabric backdrop. (I hope that won't damage my chances for future sponsored posts.) This is probably the least chic location these pants have ever been photographed in, given the shocking price they command in store.

In the photo below the pink is slightly more accurate, at least on this monitor. And I was wearing a black scarf choker too.

So huuuge, huuuuge THANKS to my sponsor. Before I reveal who it is, let me just say that clearly I'm in the Big Leagues now. I was shocked to be offered this deal. Don't worry - I'll still be your friend. And don't be jealous!! I have loved (and occasionally loathed, I admit) this sponsor for years, and their commitment to chocolate and pudding and chips.

Yes, I am the sponsor. I am the sponsor of all my posts, except I did one for Karina Dresses and one for Yuzhe Studios. I saw these pants, I liked them, and paid myself to wear them. They are vintage I suspect, and home-made. Dreamy.

When I was finished the pants shoot, I decided to exercise my magic wand, Grushenka, which had been languishing in the cupboard. O made it for when I gave my lecture, "Unlearning how to paint," at the art gallery a few years ago. Such a wonderful gift. This is my impression of Tinker Bell.

So, let this post silliness be a reminder: if you're feeling deflated about not getting lots of sponsored posts, don't be. The stuff we already have in own closets is pretty fecking awesome. We're ALL SCHTARS. Yesh.

I'll be linking something here up to Patti's Visible Monday at Not Dead Yet Style and Catherine's #iwillwearwhatilike at Not Dressed as Lamb. Of course.

I'm so cheeky, heh. Raspberry kisses to you all!!


  1. Haha so funny Melanie ! This pants are fabulous ♥️

  2. wonderful silliness!! <3
    you know what - i´m totally proud that i do not need sponsored sweat shop stuff for dressing "blog worthy" - hehe!
    love this pants! if pants would suit me - this are the kind i would wear!!
    much love!! xxxxxx

  3. Ha ha ha!!! I KNEW there was a 'catch'!!!! You look divine dahhhhlingk in those magnificent trousers-I would wear those in a flash!! You look very pretty as a fairy too!!!Xx

  4. Those are some fab pants!
    Thanks for the reminder that we're all schtars. I'll act appropriately while washing dishes at work this morning. Glamorous!

  5. Fecking awesome post! Happy Sunday!

  6. Well, that sponsor has certainly studied your blog and found the right product for you to endorse - the pants (in Britland they might call them trous, short for trousers) are so feckin' YOU! Great colours, fantastic cut and fit, almost like they'd been magicked up just for you by some frilly fairy with a magic wand. <3 <3 <3 (those are hearts)

  7. Wow! LOVE those super high waisted Bay City Roller pants!

    Congratulations on sponsoring yourself. I hope you gave yourself a bonus of chips, pudding and chocolate for a job well done. Don't get the Cheezies near that gorgeous white puffy dress though.

    Your photo editing skill magic turns everything into art.


  8. I honestly thought that Miuccia Prada had sent those pants over from Italy, delivered by flying unicorn no less. You leave pretty much every designer in the dust with your styling skills. I do believe in fairies. I do. Especially the lovely and mischievous Tinker Mell.

  9. Oh Mel - you nearly had me there! I was reading and thinking "oh no, I really can't believe Mel is doing a sponsored post" I even got to the chips, chocolate and pudding bit and was suspecting I don't know what sponsor. What a relief!

    Fabulous palazzo pants and what a lovely yellow blouse you've paired it with. Those shoes are pretty amazing, too!

    Have a lovely week and bah humbug to the rain and snow,


  10. Mad woman. <3 I cannot think of a commercial sponsor who would do your justice and accepting their cash would be prostituting your art. Your soul would be crushed and you would slide into a gin soaked decline. we cannot let that happen!! NONONO!!!

  11. yes, Bay City Roller pants! (what WAS up with that group?)

  12. I thought it might be ... ding-dong, ding-dong - Gucci Spring-Summer/Autumn-Winter 2016 calling, although I cannot imagine you being swayed by sponsorship, darling. Like the lovely Bill Cunningham said “If you don’t take money, they can’t tell you what to do, kid.”

    As to the Bay City Rollerness of your pants. No. They had hideous tartan turn-ups on solid colour legs if my memory serves. Mind you - not something you'd ever want to remember. You look Bowie-cool if anything.


    Elaine Monkeypaints

  13. Ha! You are the best sponsor ever, and I adored this "sponsored" post. I love the pants, they are PANTS. You're amazing.

    Has the snow melted over there? We're left with weird random snow boulders in the school field near us. All the snow's gone except for some brown mounds in corners.

  14. Lqtm. You paid yourself to wear them. I f*cking love that bit. You look amazing in those pants. I know I keep saying that you look amazing like pretty much every time I see you in anything, but I speak the truth dammit. <3

    - Anna

  15. The Christmas Fairy has come early, thankyou. A self sponsored post , the only way to let your creative juices flow and let those wonderful pants shine, a stat indeed.

  16. such a fabulous pair of pants!! high waisted, cute buttons, pretty colors and lots of coolnesssss!! what else??!!
    Loving your self sponsored post!, because you're right (as usual) We're All Schtars!

  17. Ah, the "serenity that comes with success" - it's heady isn't it? LOVE these trousers, and the sponsor is the IT. I thought for sure it was going to be Marc Jacobs for 2018 (that's how far ahead you are). xox


  18. Brilliant shock tactics! And yes, you got us all going for a moment there. Fabulous pants and fantabulous fairy outfit too!!! Look at me using all of you spare exclamation marks!!!!!!
    You ought to be available on the national health service - the doc could prescribe a weekly dose of your blog instead of prozac. Happiness and serenity, what more could you want?
    Have a fab week x

  19. Ha Ha! You kept me on the edge of my seat, waiting for the name of the bashful sponsor! But what brilliant joy to discover it is YOU, Melanie! this is a most excellent post, thanks heaps. And the pants...FABULOUS! And those boots...shaggy coat... xx

  20. If you and I ever start a band, we should call it the "Stupendous Trousers" - what do you think? Excellent idea for a post - we really are the only sponsors who understand our taste.

  21. Well Tinkerbell self sponsorship seems so much more fun and less hassle to me. I laughed out loud at your puppy falls over and pees excitement, the best description ever and so how it is!!! SNOW, RAIN, and all that other dreary Winter crap, so sorry for you as we are welcoming Sunshine at last!!

  22. I hope your Sponsor provided plenty of tea and biccies to compensate you for all of your hard work!
    If Ms Sponsor ever gets tired of these fabulous baggies....I know of a good potential second home for them across the big pond!

  23. Darling, I think you will get lots of offers for sponsored post in the near future. Your star is rising. You might have to juggle it a bit. How about a nice mail to the designer whi did that fab photoshoot with you? She recognized your awesomeness and you love her clothes so it would be beneficial (and fun) for the both of you.
    As for the outfit: I love it on you. The yellow blouse is perfect with it and so are the boots. You got me in a real Christmas mood with your fairy outfit (so elegant).

  24. Very extra and super and fascinating stylization with this amazing pants. I love it !

  25. I thought the Bay City Rollers must have reformed and offered you the trews in exchange for some much-needed publicity... Go on, confess! I've never been offered anything I actually want as part of a sponsored post deal-with-the-devil, so I'll stay thoroughly unsponsored and independent!
    Looking cool as ever, Melanie. xx

  26. Whatever could be better than being sponsored by MEL!!!! Especially with pants that can stand on their own, maybe even on one leg. Pumping up the Plaid, bay-bee. You're a natural.

  27. The pants are amazing. And better yet! They're sponsored by YOU! And I adore your impression of Tinker Bell. xo

  28. That very artful photo of your fairy side is the best. One of my favorite moments of the year. It's just too good to be a passing phase so I hope to see her again.
    These pants look very special. That's the kind of wool that hangs like silk.
    Lovely. The blouse and coat look like you stepped out of couture-ville.
    I'm so glad you're self-sponsored Mel. Few sponsors could measure up to your tough standards?


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