I am not a cone

A big cotton dress worn backwards, a tablecloth, a tutu, a wedding dress, two hoop skirts, and a pink net skirt. The writing, tacked on in felt letters, says, THIS IS NOT A CONE.

The inspiration for this fark fantasy is courtesy of the painter Magritte, the brilliant design duo of Viktor & Rolf, and Shelley of Forest City Fashionista who challenged me to riff on Viktor & Rolf's latest collection, which featured big dresses with memes on the front. Shelley's version is awesome, HERE. She also includes more background on the V&R collection.

Below, feeling couture-ish in my favourite neighbourhood garden. I wanted to experience what it would be like to actually wear something like this as everyday wear. Short answer: I did in fact feel like a giant cone and passersby approached with prudent caution.

I loved doing this shoot - a couple of hours with my tripod - but the tablecloth kept snagging on my glitter platform shoes and shrubbery. I hate when that happens!

The underpinnings above. And I was wearing tights and jeggings and three long-sleeved shirts to keep off the chill on this sunny but cold day. The breastplate of the wedding dress is jewel-encrusted and weighs a ton. It's hidden under there too.

I did not edit the next photo. The sun created a brilliant patch of light in this alcove. But I'll never scramble up a hill like that in those shoes or that dress again.

This bumper-car of a dress is now deconstructed, making transportation and life in general much simpler.

Thanks for this challenge, Shelley. It was a great way to beat the winter doldrums.

Also, stylista Monica, who writes the blog Mrs. Allnut, found me in one of Spain's top magazines S MODA EL PAÍS. Hahaha! It's also in Brazil I think. I had no idea there was a print version. She scanned the cover and the article photo and emailed them to me. Wow. Huge hugs, Monica!

And finally, I was included in The Zoe Report, which is a big online thing, HERE.
"11 Stylish Women Over 50 You Should Be Following on Instagram." The writer, Sarah Lindig, asked for permission to use my photo for a piece she was working on. And then, bam, there it was!

There's lots going on here, and work work work. I'll be holed up for a while at it. I hope you are all surviving the season, whatever it may throw at you - heat or cold. Thank you thank you for visiting.

I'm linking up to Patti at Not Dead Yet for her Visible Monday and Catherine at #iwillwearwhatilike at Not Dressed as Lamb - as I do.

Not quite minimalist, but trying hard in Mel Nation

Having fun in the summer sun, although that day I had to wear this houndstooth Pepe Jeans London jacket to keep off the morning chill. I got it at Talize thrift store in Delta, BC, during a blogger meetup in early June. See my post HERE. I liked this outfit so much, I defied gravity. It was uncanny.

Oh behave!! WHAP! Hm, I seem to be enjoying that action a bit too much. 

Who, me? I am the model of robotic poetry.

I was wearing this and that. The floaty blouse and runners, which I farked, are originally from My Sister's Closet eco thrift boutique, proceeds to Battered Women's Shelter Services in Vancouver.

The parasol has become a summer staple. I have two, both from Lily-Lark, to suit every mood. No more skulking in shadows, except my own. That would make me a self-skulker. 

The jumpsuit below is vintage '70s I'm guessing, and I sold it. What was I thinking?! I opened an Etsy shop called Mel Nation and this was the first listing - my only listing. Mel Nation is ultra, ultra exclusiff; it has nothing to do with me being lazy or decision avoidance, no, nothing whatsoever.

If you want to see my empty storefront, it's here. So exciting. When I replenish my entire inventory, I shall invite you to become citizens of Mel Nation as well. No borders, just fruity drinks with umbrellas by the poolside and a secret handshake, which I'm currently choreographing.

With the brown belt above, with no belt below. This piece is on its way to Oslo. If you hear maniacal laughter coming from the sky above, wave, as it's the jumpsuit flying overhead. 

With this massive sell-off, life here is so calm, so KonMarie, in reference to Marie Kondo's bestselling book, "The life-changing magic of tidying up." Sigh. Ohmmmm.

HaHaHaHAHAHA!!!!!

I made these sketches in 2015 - on the same day. Clearly, they are as relevant now as they were three years ago in Mel Nation, which, come to think of it, sounds almost like damnation. How weird is that? They were originally posted on July 1, 2015, "Let your clothes choose your profession, and Hat Attack." 

Below, obviously these are white wolves at the Four Seasons Hotel in downtown Vancouver.

You can see the brolly bag below. Slung over my shoulder it reminds me of Asian weaponry. Whap! 

And red.

With Turniphead. Because.

I know I'm late, but in case you missed it, Sherry of Petite Over 40 made an awesome video of our June meetup. I laugh every time I see it. Her post is Blogger Meet-Up Proves Vancouver's Got Talent. Suzanne's meetup posts are Strike a Pose Blogger Style - Blogger Meet Up 2018 and Breakfast at Tiffany's Prom Do Over.

VIDEO by Sherry, Petite Over 40

That's all from here. I'm going to link up to Patti at Not Dead Yet Style for Visible Monday, and Catherine at Not Dressed as Lamb for #iwillwearwhatilike.

I hope you are all well. Big hugs to all. Thank you so much for dropping by!!

My big screen debut

I recently attended a pre-screening of a film. Why? Because I'm in it! It's a documentary feature called Keep It In The Streets. As such, I didn't have to memorize anything, but I still managed to flub my lines. Heh.

What's the film about? The YouTube trailer caption says: "A nameless group of street photographers chronicle what happens when they start to interact with, and wake up to the city they live in." Yes, that's exactly it. (Trailer is below.)

I was photographed by two of the filmmakers a couple of years ago one wintry day outside of Nordstrom, and then last summer they caught me again coming out of the library, which is when they asked for a short interview.

So I'm in a few scenes, along with some photos from Bag and a Beret. Several movie-goers asked for info about my blog after the screening, which was surreal, considering I thought I'd have ended up on the cutting-room floor. I was relieved that the "flubbed" parts were gone though.

A still from the movie trailer

I love this movie (not just because I'm in it, heh). What's cool is there is no one star. The filmmakers captured a diversity of people. With such passion. Such joie de vivre. It is a true showcase of what complex yet simple creatures we humans are. We want the same things - to be happy, to pursue our dreams of every size and shape, to connect, to find and share compassion. Very uplifting.

Keep It In The Streets let me experience my city in a fresh new light. That's the trailer below.

The young men who made this hope to get the film in the doc film fest roster, which would be awesome. I wish them luck. Their sense of purpose, vision, and total lack of pretension were a blast of fresh air. It was an honour to be included in this project. I'll keep you posted on developments.

Behind the scenes. The film has an amazing original soundtrack.

In the meantime, check out the Keep It In The Streets Instagram HERE, which features photos and clips from the film. And their YouTube channel HERE, where they have an excellent "Brainwash Teaser." Feel free to spread the love. Keep It In The Streets. What's it called again? Oh yeah, Keep It In The Streets. 

In more news...

Lyn Slater, Accidental Icon, just won a Shorty Award, which are social media awards, in the category of Fashion - not fashion over 40, not fashion over 50, just Fashion. Whoa. That's progress. She has always said age is not a factor. Way to go, Lyn! See her at the podium HERE. 

Also, Catherine, Not Dressed as Lamb has won her second UK Blog Award for Fashion & Beauty, again, a win where age is not a factor. Congratulations! Her post is HERE. 

AND...

I made a tiny video of how I felt wearing a vintage dusty-yellow brocade coat I recently altered. It was a coat-dress and I opened up the front so that now it is definitely a coat. I've left the edges raw, which I might keep this way - time will tell. You have to click the photo to see the movie, which is on my Instagram.

There is not a really clear view of the coat - it's just a capture of my mood. I'll show the coat more clearly another time. 

And below, what I wore today, my floral bell-bottom pants with a burgundy burnt velvet blouse, and man shoes, yes.

I almost forgot to post the outfit shot. Then how could I link to Patti and Catherine? So here we go: linking to Visible Monday at Not Dead Yet Style and #iwillwearwhatilike at Not Dressed at Lamb. See you there!

Have a stellar week, all! May your boundaries be stretched - in a good way.

Becoming a better blogger, and vintage Versace

My stair pose, taught to me personally by the one who made it famous: Sheila of Ephemera. I'm wearing my vintage 100% wool Gianni Versace Couture pants, made in Italy, with front zip and inner ankle zips, $15 maybe - I forget now - newly sprung from a spacebag. And a bold fuchsia oversized silky top and red earrings. That's my red journal on the steps.

And now, onto important matters.

I reeeeally, reeeally want to be a better blogger and Instagrammer. That's why I was so happy when Suzanne sent me a link a while ago to a YouTube video by wildly successful Aimee Song, who has 3.5 million IG followers and almost 300,000 followers on Bloglovin' (Song of Style) - geez, that's a lot.

I thought I'd try out some of her tips. Here we go.

I have to take a bird's eye photo of what goes into my body in the morning. She had an artful cappuccino photo with her clutch and sunglasses. Well, I forgot to take a "before" shot, but this is the dirty bowl from my oatmeal, plain, with milk and half a sliced banana and Kashi cereal sprinkles.

Not bad, but not as good as Aimee's, even though I placed an artboard on the tabletop because it is more arty than the regular tabletop and I included my napkin bit for visual punch. Still, it's a bit boring.

Above: Definitely better. Oh, there's a little Kashi nugget at 4:30 on the bowl dial.

Below: Nighttime dining photo. Aimee says when dining in a dimly-lit restaurant with friends, it's a good idea to illuminate your food as a group using light from your cell phones. This is the best I could do.

I knew I wouldn't be dining out this evening so I practiced by dragging my breakfast tray into the bathroom where it was dark and lit it with a flashlight because I don't have a cell phone, or friends. There's that nugget again!

Next: Aimee says to make sure you take multiple detail shots of your outfit, especially your shoes and your pedicure.

I call this photo Fun With Band-aids. This is a springtime look many gals know too well as our warm-weather sockless footwear bites the crap out of our tender winter feet. I decorated my Band-aids with Sharpies and white-out. Nice, right? Those are my white platform flip-flops.

And finally, more accessories.

I used these for making this post. That's the flashlight on the left. I had it turned on but it's hard to see. You know why, right? Aimee suggests using natural light so I did.

Aimee has lots more fun suggestions, like asking strangers to take your photos and being bossy about it, using back-lighting to get a halo effect and natural light to look good. She didn't mention anything about having a team of professional photographers to take your photos though.

Sigh.

Okay, so maybe not. Pffft.
To be fair, Aimee's video was helpful in that surreal if-only-I-were-normal kind of way.

So back to reality...

You can see the purplish tones in the blouse in this photo.

And I've been making collages lately. This is one of them.

That's all. I'll link up to Patti at Not Dead Yet Style for Visible Monday and Catherine at Not Dressed as Lamb for #iwillwearwhatilike. Catherine kindly included me in her lineup of "9 Fashion Bloggers with a Really Unique Sense of Style." Thank you! I may not have 300,000 followers, but I have you guys - you're the BEST!!

Have a great week!

But is it still a T-shirt?

Finding your art oomph after it's been lost for weeks can be a religious experience. I had been wandering listlessly through a haze of bleh, pfft, and meh. I was practically drooling in lethargy. Daily I would stare with blank eyes at my art materials and fabric carefully arranged all over the living room floor in emergency preparedness and as hopeful prompts for a fark attack. (See glossary below for clarification.)

Then, WHAM!!! Turn down the volume!! I got the fever. I farked a T-shirt! Hurrah!! This white XL T-shirt is now a kimono-y T-shirt with dual-purpose sleeves - short or extra long. It was a transcendental farkathon. 

It's a mysterious world. Oh yesh. 

This calls for some singing: "I can bring home the bacon, ba-rah-da-dum, Fry it up in a pan, ba-rah-da-dum, And never ever let you forget it's not spam..." Cause I'm classy like that. Getting my fark beat back makes me feel almighty. I want to sing like Peggy Lee.

Blue brows above. I wore them that morning with a manly outfit and my black moto jacket, no lipstick because I was digging the sallow pallor. When I finished the shirt in the afternoon, I decided to team it and the brows with my farked rocker pants and boots for a shoot in the concrete box round about midnight. Lipstick was essential.

Note the hair cut, courtesy of O. Above is a jeans photo I took today, when I actually wore the T-shirt outside for the first time under a vintage ivory Asian-style silk jacket. 

:: DETAILS - START ::

[Skip to the end if this stuff bores you. There is no test.]

I sliced the T-shirt up the front middle, overlapped the two sides and stitched them in place with contrasting thread. I had an old blue cardigan and I cut off the sleeves, then separated the front and back pieces. I folded the front piece in half length-wise, keeping it buttoned, and sewed it shut to make a tube. Then I sewed the waistband end to the T-shirt sleeve. Now I can easily stick my arm through wherever I like.

I did the same for the green floral shirt, except in reverse - I sewed the green shirt collar end to the T cuff. I also kept the short-sleeve on the green shirt so I can have short sleeves or long.

The slit opening at my right wrist used to be the cardigan V-neck. And there's the green shirt armhole at my left elbow. I turned the sleeve up in this photo - they are both very long, which I like. 

I also took up the shoulder of the white T on the left side, added a black patch for detail, and slit the side seams a little bit. The tag came off so I had to sew it back on because I like that mess.

:: DETAILS - FINISH ::

I love my new T-shirt. I was originally going to write all over it - "I am not a brand!" - but I hesitated at the last minute. Some things are done when they're done. I'm not sure about this piece yet. 

There's something slightly zombie about this photo.

The blue cardigan and green top were already bagged for donation, too small, I shouldn't have bought them in the first place but I was seduced by their colour and the pattern. I was sad to see them go, so I enlisted them in my T-shirt project figuring if I make a mistake, no big deal, they were goners anyway. And of course, that's exactly the thinking I need to cozy up to the sewing machine and sew like a madwoman!! 

And have a blast! Threads flying! Machine wheezing. Pins poking and sproinging pell mell. It was quite a vortex of energy. O hid.

You should see me whip those sleeves around like little helicopters. And note the cowlick in my hair. It comes from my whorl. When cows tongue-bathe their young, they create swirls in their hair, hence the word. Lovely. Ain't nobody going to be licking my hair!

Anyway, I proclaim this:

INTERNATIONAL LOVE YOUR WHORL MONTH

Glossary:

art oomph - creative spark

bleh, pfft, meh: words that kind of mean blah with a negative edge if you can work up any emotion whatsoever

fark - farked, farking, farkathon, words I made up, a combination of f*cked/faked/farted, in reference to altering, upcycling, or refashioning an existing item, especially clothing, with unexpected results

digging - member of the groovy, heavy, far-out family of words only dorks like me use these days, meaning loving

whorl: the twirly part of your hair usually on top of your head, which you curse and hide or, like me, play up like it's meant to be there - can't beat 'em, join 'em. Question: Do whorls goes the opposite direction in the Southern Hemisphere, like water going down a drain?

the lyrics: From a song made famous by Peggy Lee. Instead of "spam" the real lyrics say "man."

pell-mell: Means here and there in a chaotic way.

My blue brows and my green sleeve and blue sleeve, shoulder patch of olive mesh and black fleece. That's a ring O made me from scratch. See, yes, I do get wife bonuses all the time (in reference to last post). O is awesome.

I'll link something here up with Patti's Visible Monday, Not Dead Yet Style, and Catherine's #iwillwearwhatilike at Not Dressed at Lamb. And a big thank you to Catherine for her post this week HERE on how more brands should be enlisting 40+ blogger women in their campaigns. And I'm happy to see Claire get this exposure for her brilliant designs. Thanks, Catherine! 

And I can't believe with all these colours I'm not wearing amethyst, Anne's prompt at SpyGirl for 52-Pick-me-up. Oh well, go have a look anyway and link if you're wearing amethyst.

What have you been up to lately?

Hey, where's my wife bonus?!

When everything is for sale, so much depends on making a good pitch.

But a good pitch alone isn't enough. You need to have a clearly defined target audience, aka friends. In a bid for self-improvement, I shall reprogram my internal algorithm which will convey my value more arithmetically not only to others but also myself, thereby enhancing my brand appeal and user interface. Hurrah! Whaaa...?

The mural backdrop is a snapshot of my existing algorithm. Tsk, tsk, tsk.

My algorithm is fecked. That's it in the background. Of course my user interface is whacked. My DIY T-shirt.

Even kids are on board with this stuff, "Hey, mum, I expanded my target audience at school today." "Well done, honey. I think you just added points to your Daughter Bonus for that." Twinkle-eyed winks.

It's essential that you sell yourself in all aspects of your life; making deals should be second nature. Demand payment up front and never undersell yourself. Heh.

For example, I'm still waiting for my Wife Bonus from O, you know, for managing an efficient and attractive home. I am a strict and elaborately-dressed taskmaster when it comes to cleaning staff and rearing our children stellarly. Okay, so the kids are little silverfish (not a metaphor). I kill them regularly, well, no, I can't bear it - they are so cute - but I yell for O and he takes care of them.

I'm working hard for my wife bonus! The same frilly blouse as the previous post but with a colourful jacket made in Korea. You can see the fabric texture on the arms. Swoony. 

I have been known to body double the cleaning staff. That should get me points! Not only that, I shall demand triple Wife Bonus points for doing dangerous stunt work - it ain't easy hanging over the side of a tub juggling cleaning products and a sponge.* I was thinking I'd buy a sailboat.
(*Don't be fooled, it's all part of my pitch - I don't think I've ever done that!)

I kind of missed out on the Push Ring for pumping out a real kid. But hot-diggity-dog, it may not be too late! I've just found out that a grandmother somewhere, perhaps in an asylum, gave birth to triplets. Ooh, if I have quintuplets that means five rings, right? Tiffany, here I come! (O has just picked up the phone. I think he's calling the asylum, perhaps for himself.)

My lovely gothy/rock jacket with mini-ruffled, neon orange, high-collar blouse and flocked Anthropologie pants. New (old) lace-up ankle boots. I wear outfits like this to clean the oven, which is full of electronic goods. 

Holy cow, adding up the Wife Bonuses, the Push Rings, and the profits from my new algorithm and sales strategy, I'll be living on easy street! That's what happens when you put your best foot forward or, in this spectacular example of marketing genius, two best feet forward at the same time. Yes, I'll be the one hopping down easy street like a bunny on crack, wearing a tiara and pushing a quintuplet stroller on my way to the asylum to visit O.

Lacy dress with black slip. I almost donated it. What was I thinking?

I'm linking up to Patti's Visible Monday at Not Dead Yet Style and Catherine's #iwillwearwhatilike at Not Dressed as Lamb. I'm sure I'll see you there.

Of course, I am definitely NOT for sale. My only pitches are in dodgeball, and they are really quite pathetic. My easy street is on the floor stuffing my face with sweet and salty popcorn or Cheesies. But I am definitely open to Mel bonuses to celebrate my mere existence. Heh. (Case in point: gothy jacket self-gift)

I made that T-shirt a while ago, "I am my own brand." I'm ready to revise my statement: "I am NOT a brand. Kiss my ass." Look for it in a future post. Okay, I won't put the second sentence; that was just a general cry, but not to you, my friends, my valued target audience. Mwah!!

OH, BREAKING NEWS EDIT:
Claire Cormeau was just featured in a George Straight newspaper article, hurrah! She's the uber talented clothing designer of the line Nuage, which I wrote about in my model-ish post here. The article includes my favourite photo. Heh. It's all HERE.

_____________________________________

Glossary

Dodgeball
A team sport where players throw a ball with the intent of hitting players on an opposite team thereby eliminating them from the game. I was about eight years old the last time I played. Heh.

Hot-diggity-dog
An expression of delight or excitement. 

Push Present
A push present is a gift, usually jewellery, given to a woman by her partner after "pushing" out a baby (such a sentimental term). This is a true phenomenon - the jewellery and the pushing. If I had a baby, I'd want a push penthouse, a push billion dollars, a push nanny, a push personal assistant... In fact, I said shove it to the whole thing many decades ago. Shouldn't I get a Shove-It Ring?

Wife Bonus
The term wife bonus was first revealed in a non-fiction book called The Primates of Park Avenue, as the money paid to a Manhattan wife by her banker husband for a wifey job well done. The book was later recalled and marketed as fiction. A hideous concept! O is not the boss of me nor I of him - usually. There is no Daughter Bonus - I made that up.


AND (jeez, she just won't shut up) -

I LOOOVE Mexico! I was featured in Elle magazine's online Mexico edition as one of the 40+ Bloggers You Should Know, along with Accidental Icon, une femme d'un certain âge, Style Crone, and Not Dressed as Lamb. And the translation wasn't mangled at all! Bwahaha! I was shocked to be included. And of course very happy.

Thank you, ELLE! Well, and thank you to everyone who visits me up here in the colonies. Mwah!

Okay, now I'll shut up. Heh. Have a great week you's guys.

A celebration of consumption

A store opened today. A big one. A Nordstrom in Vancouver. I had been looking forward to this since that city block was locked down over a year ago, and I planned to be there this morning when the doors opened at precisely 9:30 to celebrate its revival. I piled on my blue glitter eye shadow in readiness. Unfortunately, my hair was intent on a fashionably late entrance. 

Hurling myself into the throng of shoppers and gawkers when I arrived, yes, late, and breathless, was like being back in Shibuya or Ginza, Japan - exhilarating, the bustle, the chatter, the furtive smiles back and forth between strangers, the gentle jostling. Apart from athletics and concerts, this opening is probably one of the few events capable of drawing together such a large, eclectic, and enthusiastic crowd. Shopping - the great unifier. 

I can't see myself buying retail at Nordstrom very often given my love of thrifting and vintage, but I'll visit regularly for its coffee shop and bistro, design inspiration, and, importantly, shelter from inclement weather when walking to point B down the street. 

In terms of the store itself, I was delighted to see the high-end menswear section located right next to the children's wear and baby clothes. Heh. And I liked the art on the walls everywhere I looked.

I was also sad to see such a grand and hugely expensive celebration for what? A new bastion of consumption. Of course I am a consumer and planned on attending this opening weeks in advance. Still, it made me ponder what Earth will be like 50 years from now with such a huge daily drain on her resources. "Hurrah for thrifting," I feebly consoled myself in the midst of such luxury.

Dramatic high-waisted palazzo pants with my favourite DIY cropped tartan jacket and towering black glitter booties created a tree-like effect, and the reactions that greeted me as I strolled down the gleaming new aisles (like I owned the joint of course) were startling.

Below, a selfie taken in a mirror in the hall leading to the washrooms, which of course I had to inspect. Happily, all was in order.

A street outside Nordstrom had been shut down to accommodate tents where the store ran a free Beauty Event that started at 7:30 AM(!); they probably sold tons of under-eye concealer - clever. I caught the tail-end of the action, and surprise, surprise, they were offering a real free breakfast (reference to the Ted no-toast Baker opening I attended). Plus, there were food trucks with mini doughnuts. Hurrah!

I have more photos of merchandise in the store, mostly colourful menswear, but I've had enough of Stuff for one day. I enjoyed the circus-like atmosphere of gaiety, but the soundtrack, if you listened too carefully, tended to warp into slo-mo like some B horror movie. Thank goodness the reset was only a flash of colourful faux fur away. 

I celebrate the rebirth of this downtown section of the city. It's my city after all, and I love that I can tromp through its core street and anchor store once again. Just don't expect me to buy anything there. Okay, maybe from the reject pile. Oops, there's that slo-mo music again. Make it stop!

This is for Patti's Visible Monday at Not Dead Yet Style in case I don't post again before Monday. I never know when the blogging muse will strike. It's also for Catherine's #iwillwearwhatiwant at Not Dressed as Lamb whose prompt this time is Statement Shoes - my sky-high glitter booties.

That's all. Have you ever shopped at Nordstrom? Yay or nay? I'd never been in one until today. 

ALSO - If you haven't already treated yourself, you must be sure to check out the following hilarious and inspiring post:

Suzanne Carillo's styling of

the Freakish Yellow Skirt

HERE

Yes, the Travelling Yellow Skirt Freak Show is back in action. See the previous post for details.