Yellow Skirt Update!! And a middle-aged debutante

I got my new business cards. Which means - I've ARRIVED! It's like being a debutante but older and better, although I still haven't reached my age of maturity. 

When my cards arrived, I danced around my home doing 3D effects like those 1970s Saturday Night Live skits "in 3D" where the actors zoomed in and out of the camera with echoey voices. I must have said to O umpteen billion times, "Look at my new card! LOOK! Bwahahaha. In 3D!" Poor man. I gave him one. It still left me with 199.

Left front; right back; there is no middle

I know it's just printing on paper (although I ordered the slightly thicker card stock) but somehow I regard this little card as a mini passport to my dreams. No more scrumply, scratchy, ripped napkins with ink blots and coffee drips! People will see me and say, "Now there's a woman with a card!" And then, "Double-sided? That's one classy dame."

Blooper. Ruffle slap.

I'm practising:

"Oh, if you like this outfit, you might like my blog. Here's my card." 

"On your TV show? I'll check my schedule. Here's my card." 

"My fan club? Come to think of it, I could use a chapter in Fargo. Here's my card." 

"I agree. Your people and my, uh, person should talk. Here's my card."
"O, where did I put my feckity-frickin' cards!!"

In the photo above, I'm practising how to walk in New York. On my IG, I demonstrate how I would hail a taxi in major cities around the world. I must be prepared for, you know, whenever. Now that I have cards.

So next, I just have to: a) remember to bring my cards with me, and; b) remember where I'm carrying them - pocket, purse, hair? Funny thing is, after being out card-armed twice already, I haven't given any away, nor have I sold any - that would be tacky. So what's the problem? Then it hit me:

I have to be fabulous to engage in card exchange, not shamefacedly lacklustre. So now there is pressure to live up to my card! It's not difficult to achieve that werewolf face on a daily basis, but that composed gown look? For feck's sake, I was posing in an ideal world completely cut off from reality. (The gown is from Pao, Project Minima. It was her Mum's.)

I should have featured stained stretched-out yoga pants and a threadbare sweatshirt, but they would have cost a fortune at a high-end designer store, and after buying these cards who can afford that? Maybe chewing gum hanging out of my mouth, or chips, would have been better. Less pressure. Live and learn, folks. Live and learn. Speaking of chips, I finally updated my About Me page.

The security guard asked me what I was doing in the parking lot above. He was worried I was taking photos of the wall. When he found out I was taking photos of myself, he felt better and we shook hands. If I had my cards then, I would have given him one. Top and flocked pants from Talize, vintage wonder coat from Super Thrift Sister Su!!

Below is the tartan jacket I farked in May 2015 here, my ruffled blouse, and pants that used to belong to Mr. Sanchez. They have a billion buttons on the front.

There was a gap in the barricades to this alley and naturally I took advantage - they weren't done painting yet. But I asked, and the painters recognized me for the debutante I am and graciously agreed to let me take some photos but to mind the wet paint. I did. I'd have given them cards but I forgot them at home.

Even if I don't use these cards, I can smile and smirk knowing I have them, my own mini passport to a world of possibilities. Bwahahaha. Do you have a card? Does it make you feel wonderful? If not, what are you waiting for? Go make another one!! I always used to feel like a dweeb telling people I have a style blog - I'm over it.

And now -

A FREAKISH YELLOW SKIRT UPDATE!

Iris eyed Frida's flower headband

"Hm, I could use a headband like that," she mused.

"Not to mention that SKIRT!! That FREAKISH WONDER."

But before she could grab it, a monkey screeched,

sending a STARTLED vicious seal onto the 

sumo wrestler's shoulder, and he didn't 

even notice because he was BUSY

mooning over...

ANJA

CURLY TRAVELLER

and the travelling yellow skirt freak show come to life

G O!   G O   NOW !!!

What a fantastical journey brought to you by Anja and the Yellow Skirt in Singapore. With a surprise Special Guest whom many of you know. Bwhahaha!!! So. Much. Fun. 

Believe it or not, I've given you a somewhat accurate picture of events in this little blurb. The imagination! The creativity! And you should see what she added to FYS. You can't miss this. Thank you so much, Anja! 

That's all for this week.

I'm linking up to Patti at Not Dead Yet Style for Visible Monday, and Catherine at Not Dressed as Lamb for #iwillwearwhatilike. See you there maybe?

Edit: I also linked up to Midlife Fun: Pattern Mix, at Tinaspinkfriday. HERE.

UH-OH, SHE HAS A BAD CASE OF...

BEING BAD.

       SHE IS BAD       

I'M OVER 53. I've EARNED ME THE

RIGHT TO SOME BIG BAD - 

we're talkin' 'tude.

I SPIT BAD FLOWERS. DON'T TRIP ON THEM;

MAKE A BOUQUET?

I'M WEARING CLOTHES. SOME THRIFTED, SOME GIFTS. ALL TERRIBLY, HORRIBLY BAD. 

Bad plaid. Very, very bad. Baaad.

say it like a goat

worn to the nordstrom opening, sep 19 post - 

farked tartan jacket, big bad pants.

adding to bella's linkup for plaidurday at citizen rosebud 

(edit: the link is not on anymore. oh well.)

AND

THERE'S CARROT IN MY SCARF/WRAP, MAYBE EVEN 

STUCK IN MY TEETH, SO I'M LINKING 

TO ANNE'S 52 PICK-ME-UP: CARROT/PERSEVERENCE

AT SPYGIRL

______________________________________

THIS IS A NO-GUILT POST. FEEL FREE NOT TO COMMENT. 

TOO MANY POSTS TO KEEP UP. 

Edit: I had a birthday during 2015, but not terribly, horribly recently. All I can say is I'm not a Libra. I've just been thinking about age lately.

A celebration of consumption

A store opened today. A big one. A Nordstrom in Vancouver. I had been looking forward to this since that city block was locked down over a year ago, and I planned to be there this morning when the doors opened at precisely 9:30 to celebrate its revival. I piled on my blue glitter eye shadow in readiness. Unfortunately, my hair was intent on a fashionably late entrance. 

Hurling myself into the throng of shoppers and gawkers when I arrived, yes, late, and breathless, was like being back in Shibuya or Ginza, Japan - exhilarating, the bustle, the chatter, the furtive smiles back and forth between strangers, the gentle jostling. Apart from athletics and concerts, this opening is probably one of the few events capable of drawing together such a large, eclectic, and enthusiastic crowd. Shopping - the great unifier. 

I can't see myself buying retail at Nordstrom very often given my love of thrifting and vintage, but I'll visit regularly for its coffee shop and bistro, design inspiration, and, importantly, shelter from inclement weather when walking to point B down the street. 

In terms of the store itself, I was delighted to see the high-end menswear section located right next to the children's wear and baby clothes. Heh. And I liked the art on the walls everywhere I looked.

I was also sad to see such a grand and hugely expensive celebration for what? A new bastion of consumption. Of course I am a consumer and planned on attending this opening weeks in advance. Still, it made me ponder what Earth will be like 50 years from now with such a huge daily drain on her resources. "Hurrah for thrifting," I feebly consoled myself in the midst of such luxury.

Dramatic high-waisted palazzo pants with my favourite DIY cropped tartan jacket and towering black glitter booties created a tree-like effect, and the reactions that greeted me as I strolled down the gleaming new aisles (like I owned the joint of course) were startling.

Below, a selfie taken in a mirror in the hall leading to the washrooms, which of course I had to inspect. Happily, all was in order.

A street outside Nordstrom had been shut down to accommodate tents where the store ran a free Beauty Event that started at 7:30 AM(!); they probably sold tons of under-eye concealer - clever. I caught the tail-end of the action, and surprise, surprise, they were offering a real free breakfast (reference to the Ted no-toast Baker opening I attended). Plus, there were food trucks with mini doughnuts. Hurrah!

I have more photos of merchandise in the store, mostly colourful menswear, but I've had enough of Stuff for one day. I enjoyed the circus-like atmosphere of gaiety, but the soundtrack, if you listened too carefully, tended to warp into slo-mo like some B horror movie. Thank goodness the reset was only a flash of colourful faux fur away. 

I celebrate the rebirth of this downtown section of the city. It's my city after all, and I love that I can tromp through its core street and anchor store once again. Just don't expect me to buy anything there. Okay, maybe from the reject pile. Oops, there's that slo-mo music again. Make it stop!

This is for Patti's Visible Monday at Not Dead Yet Style in case I don't post again before Monday. I never know when the blogging muse will strike. It's also for Catherine's #iwillwearwhatiwant at Not Dressed as Lamb whose prompt this time is Statement Shoes - my sky-high glitter booties.

That's all. Have you ever shopped at Nordstrom? Yay or nay? I'd never been in one until today. 

ALSO - If you haven't already treated yourself, you must be sure to check out the following hilarious and inspiring post:

Suzanne Carillo's styling of

the Freakish Yellow Skirt

HERE

Yes, the Travelling Yellow Skirt Freak Show is back in action. See the previous post for details.

If Bieber can wear it, so can I

I was arrested by this siren-red thing drooping on the $5 rail as I did my regular thrift shop walk-by. What was it? Jammies? Undies? For exercise? For seduction? It was constructed well, but I finally bought it because it said The Norwegian Original and I have always admired Scandinavian countries.

It turns out this onesie by OnePiece is high-flyin' celeb style and this Slim Fit like mine retails for $149. The OnePiece site features countless photos of young music/film/TV stars wearing them (here), including Justin Bieber in a red one. Well, if he can wear one, so can I. 

Of course, Bieber is fly, he's down.* I'm down and I can be a fly in training, which would make me, um, a maggot. Moving right along.

A winning feature of this garment is you can zip it right up over your face. Boo-yeeah! Think of all those bad hair days, zip and gone! The company is clearly missing a vital marketing opportunity in the middle-aged tween group of women who are maladjusted and will go to any lengths to conceal the signs of aging. 

My fear of using the tripod in Stanley Park for this self-timer photo was I'd zip this onesie shut and not be able to unzip it. By the time I would have gnawed by way through the cotton, not only would my camera and tripod be gone, but I'd be surrounded by hoards of tourists filming the Canadian wildlife, which would be absurd - I'm only still a maggot. 

I chose the park for these photos because I liked the quivering contrast between the urban street punk and tranquillity vibe, and between the red and green. (And in case I got lost - I'd be easier to find.)

My rating of this OnePiece? Tip-top. It was comfortable, except for a slight diaper-walk effect from the dropped crotch. There was a convenient bottom-up zip for emergencies - of what nature we can only speculate - and handy pockets at crotch level too. Yes. Well. 

I think I should be on the celebrity page. I'm almost fly. I'm down, not today particularly because I had fun in the park, but sometimes I am. Please put me on the Celebrity Page. 

Contact pr.usa@onepiece.com. (Just thought I'd throw that into the universe, heh.)

*I am not a fan of Bieber. I don't even know any of his songs. And this is NOT a sponsored post.

And I went out for lunch with my friend Sharron yesterday and afterwards we took photos. I've featured her before on my street style blog, here and here. This is one of my favourite shots from her iPhone; she encouraged me to post it and I love it, so here it is. 

Photo by Sharron Burnard, 2015

I'm wearing the farked jacket from two posts ago with men's sailor pants, chain belt as a necklace, and magic loupe. I'm also wearing new lipstick courtesy of Sharron. THANK YOU! I LOVE IT! The Holt Renfrew woman put it on me professionally and I noticed the difference with my Crayola crayon approach.

And another red thing I saw at the park today:

Finally, a huge thank you to Debbie Iles at Lily Sage & Co. for featuring me on her Friday Showcase on the weekend. She is a wildly talented sewist and I was honoured to be on her blog. And thank you for your very kind, generous comments! 

I hope you all have a fantastic weekend. And don't worry. After I become a onesie schtar I won't forget you. I better go practise getting down in the fly way now.

Dumpy to punky tartan jacket

BEFORE

(If you believe in the sanctity of a traditional vintage tartan jacket, leave this post right now!)

I bought this vintage wool jacket by Skirtmaker of Canada for only $5 at My Sister's Closet a few months ago. As I walked by, it poked me and said: PUNK! Never mind that it was much too huge on me - to close it, the front flaps overlapped the pockets - I had to have it. We'll just see who's the punk here.

O took these photos. The green stripes are painter's tape which I used during the ideas phase.
Turnip Head kept jumping on O's back and laughing.

The wool fabric was beautiful, except for there being so much of it, and I loved the padded linebacker shoulders, cuffed sleeves, stiff interfacing, silky red lining, and matched seams. But as is, all this jacket was good for was taunting me. I couldn't ignore its punk pulse!

Then finally I had an idea; rather, I had a bout of bravado with scissors.

AFTER 

Much better...aaah. I ran straight to the alley. And I didn't use my camp stool this time.

Love this camera angle.

This isn't your cup of tea? Perhaps you'd like something shaken and stirred. Like my Everest-best hair.

Details: This whole outfit was probably less than $30. Bwahaha.

• origami tartan wool jacket, upcycled, thrifted for $5
• thrifted black jeans, $5
• thrifted Steve Madden army boots, I don't remember, $15?
• thrifted white GAP large T-shirt, $5
• gifted magic loupe

I've got my late-seventies/early-eighties Vivienne Westwood groove on, especially with the peaky hair, which gave a stellar performance for my shoot, even in the wind - a woman asked me how I keep it so vertical so she could tell her son. Heh. 

Probably I couldn't replicate the jacket design again if I tried. There was serious origami work going on to achieve the asymmetrical design.

Rear belt flaps as front straps, buttons near shoulders, reconfigured lapel on left, asymmetrical closure.

The original rear belt was transformed into two front straps and I sewed the pocket flaps onto the back of the jacket as embellishment. I didn't reduce the width, merely sewed two button just under the shoulder and folded and darted and hacked as needed.

I also transferred an existing buttonhole from the cut-off fabric to the end of one of the front straps (left side in photo); it was easier than making a brand new matching buttonhole, at least for me. What a slacker! 

Decorative pocket flaps.

Below the collar is down, but I think I prefer it up.  

I thought of making the profile more body-hugging, then decided, nah, I like that bag effect. And I thought of hanging chains from the hem, but, no, that would be too prosaic. But I did feel like doing the pogo.

The alley here was busy. I wanted to say, in a very ladylike voice: Excuse me, sir, can you not FRIGGIN' SEE I'M PHOTOGRAPHING MY NEW JACKET HERE!!?? Nyunh, puh.

Accidental snap when a van had the audacity to photo bomb my set.

I'm so happy I could share this with you. That's one of the great things about blogging that keeps me going.

I'm hooking this Jacket-I-Love-So-Much to Patti's Visible Monday. It didn't have much of a pulse, but it was certainly "not dead yet style". I need to see what you're wearing! 

And below, one final styling I wore today.

Breakdancing? Doh, wrong era. (photo was rotated, floor removed)

This outfit cost $15, minus the shoes: thrifted t-shirt $5, thrifted mod-ish wool maxi vintage skirt (with a new zipper) $5, jacket $5, magic loupe gift, thrifted shoes maybe $15.

Okay, that's all. It was a big post. It was a big jacket. I'm working hard at the moment and had to resort to the concrete box. Better than nothing I guess.

Have you got clothes taunting you? How do you shut them up!!?