Menocore style because they're not menopausal

A woman turns 50 and she suddenly turns into a confident potato with waistless pants, at least that seems to be the view of menocore, the hot flash style trend among 20- and 30-something women who love dressing up (in this case, dressing down) as menopausal women. How flattering - a style that looks so good it's simply named after our reproductive life cycle. And by the way, you have the face for radio!

When I found the word menocore in a New York Times article, The New Mom Uniform of Park Slope, the hair on the back of my neck stood up, like a detective who smells blood - or not. The writer called it a "a hateful takeoff on normcore." I followed the link to the source: the blog Man Repeller, a June 2018 post called Menocore is the New Normcore, and It's a Lot More Comfortable. Now I know who dunnit.

This coat is a men's XXL - solid menopausal style.
photos by @vancouverbarbara, edits by moi

I learned that menocore celebrates baggy clothing, hair scrunchies, exposed bra straps, neutrals, and a host of other fun stuff we wear. And we are lauded for not caring how we look to other people. It's because we're so frigging confident. Ross writes that with the menocore trend, we middle-agers are finally getting our time in the spotlight, meaning, presumably, baggy neutrals have never looked so good because now they are on young bods?

Don't get me wrong. Menocore has certainly empowered me. That's why I'm excited to announce here, for the first time, a new trend for us of the baggy-pants set: Fertilcore (or Menstrucore, your call), named after the reproductive life cycle of women in their 20s and 30s. How freeing to feel insecure enough that we can finally care how we look! Hooray! If my friends raise an eyebrow and say, Gee, Mel, you're looking very Fertilcore today, I can blame it on those frisky fertiles.

New fab Fertilcore look: gold lycra catsuit, platform runners, neon yellow wig, white brows you can't see here. This outfit is not my fault!

So rip up those What Not to Wear Over 30 lists, my menopausal friends. Hello mini skirts, stilettos, and hoop earrings! And don't miss my soon-to-be-released list of What Not to Wear in Your Reproductive Years. I mean, if you want to dress as mutton, you better do it right!

Fertilcore - here we come! 
See my attempts at super-tight leather pants here and here if you haven't already.

I have to say, I won't hold menocore against its adherents. I am satisfied knowing that hopefully some day they will all experience the special secret surprises that accompany menopause and middle age.

And I get it: comfortable clothing feels good and can look great. But why not have the vagina (because balls are for juggling) to just own it all on its own? I think that's what menocore is about anyway - confidence, period, or not. My fertile-free-ness should not be an excuse for someone's neutrals any more than someone's fertility should be an excuse for my platform shoes. 

I thought women's style had progressed beyond an us/them issue. We are all in this together, for the whole ride. So how about we forget about ageist labels altogether and enjoy what we all bring to the table? (Like Pao's comment - womanocore?)

As Jessica at Warning: Curves Ahead concluded in her famous viral blog post in response to a list about what women shouldn't wear over 30: "24 Things Women Over 30 Should Wear: Whatever the f*ck they want." Words we can all live by any time.

Cool sparkly owl pendant from Patti, Not Dead Yet Style.

Edit: I'm linking up to Catherine's #Share All Linkup at Not Dressed as Lamb. And later to her #iwillwearwhatilike. I'll also link to the next Visible Monday at Patti's Not Dead Yet Style.

Unsquish thyself

Yeah, it looks like a kimono with an obi. 

But look again. 

The scary contraption is a vintage corset in pale peach with a hook-and-eye closure at the front. The lacing appears to be a cat's cradle gone horribly wrong. Did the makers think the feminine colour would soften the harsh reality of its grim task? No matter, I love the danger/sweet disparity.

I found this vintage kimono at Blim, a cool shop and mini art school in Chinatown, which specializes in apparel with hamburger prints and googly eyes, but it also has a small rack of vintage and sample clothes. My cashmere Moschino hot pants are from there.

Not being Japanese I wanted to hybridize the kimono to reflect me and its new context, to punk it up just a bit. Specific first challenges: create an interesting closure system and find a way to shorten this without scissors. After mulling it over for several months...

My solution: a corset, which I had, and mitten clips, which consist of a stretchy band with a suspender clip at each end. I attached two clips to the corset garters at the front and one on each side. They not only keep the hem up without damaging the fabric, but they free my legs for walking and create interesting draping, especially at the back. Overall, I'd call it Punk Lite.

As for wearing clothing aligned with other places/people, I figure any clothing that appears in the public domain becomes part of our shared aesthetic dialogue and inspiration soup. Everything comes from everything. I'm dipping this kimono back into the stock with a sour twist.

This piece looks much better in motion than static and I smiled the whole time I wore it, feeling a fine zesty grating of punk and feminine - it's hard to escape the softness of the colour. And I kept the corset loose-laced so I wouldn't be squished. The kimono seemed glad of a little fresh air after lost decades of idleness. 

I know some people chop kimonos up into handbags and even shoelaces, but I couldn't bear it, at least not yet. I'm excited to see where this work-in-progress goes, colour-wise and accessory-wise, now that I have a feel for it. 

I'm linking this up to Anne of SpyGirl's 52 Pick-me-up: Pink/Discovery/Journey. 

And another piece of finished business...

I made this video sketch a couple of years ago when I found out I had to leave my studio - what a gift it was while it lasted.

I accidentally dropped the music in a few days ago when I rediscovered the clip set to Private on my YouTube channel. The sound cuts out at the end, but it's a wrap. My work is done here. I am healed! Ba-bye studio. I'm on to bigger and better things. Bwahahaha!

I am looking forward to making more videos, I can tell you! 

And one more thing:

I wanted to show you the boot combo I wore today with my vintage stretch denim, Pao's idea. I got one of the best compliments ever: "Ooo-eee!! You look ready to take on Manhattan!" I laughed because New York is the site of Sylvia's (40+ Style) imminent meetup, so it's been on my mind. Someone else referred to the denim as a one-dy. It seems more appropriate than jumpsuit.

Whew. That's all. I think. For now. We need rain so bad. The grass is like beige fringed plastic. 

Do you know the secret handshake?

"Oh geez, it's a spaceship with a giant space cat! Wait'll I tell my friends about it! They won't believe it!"

Wearing:

• thrifted stretchy graphic-print bell bottoms, high-waters style. I bought them knowing they were overpriced at $20. I hate when I can't resist, especially when there's a good chance the item is freaky enough to end up on the $5 rack if I wait. But they're mine now; I take comfort in that.
• super discount platform running shoes from Topshop last year
• thrifted Jimi Hendrix T
• thrifted long-sleeve white T
• magic loupe

Hey! Youse guys, wanna rendezvous later?! I can stay out till dark, almost 9:30, on account it's being almost summer. Parma town! I made a sign for the fort: "Boys Will Be Fart-Bombed!" And I gotta show you the new secret handshake and my glitter banana seat - looks neato with the sissy bars. Listen for my whistle and meet me at X. Catcha' later alligators. Peel out!

I want to remake the movie ET but with a gang of middle-aged women tearing around suburbia on bicycles with sissy bars and cereal box clickers clothes-pinned to the spokes. And no ET creature. I'm thinking a giant cat from outer space instead. Are you in or are you out? Got any plot-line suggestions?

CUUT!! This director is crap. She's fired before she's even hired. 

......This post is what happens when I have absolutely nothing to say. 

OH, except this:

Suzanne made this awesome card with me on it! In fact, she has made a series of cards featuring bloggers. She definitely has a talent for capturing the nuances of each person's personality and style. Check out her Instagram HERE, and a post she did HERE. (Edit: the cards are now on Suzanne's Etsy shop HERE.)

The day I got the card I had received a semi-trollish comment, which, after some thought, I deleted. Bink! Gone. Easy. The card arriving when it did was spooky. Thanks, Suzanne!

I spent this evening space-bagging (vacuum-packing) winter clothes and other clothing I haven't worn for a while. The closet feels so much  b e t  t  e  r. Sigh. It doesn't devour my hand now when I stick it in. 

I'm getting caught up, I think. Have a great week, youse guys!

PS. I'm going to hook this up to Anne's 52 Pick-me-up: Wild Card at SpyGirl. I think this is a great urban safari look, but since I'm too late for that, I'm going Wild Card. Thanks, Anne, for hosting.

Going yin-yang in the alley

Of course I look serious - look where I am: stench alley! Would you look all comfy-cozy, ooo, why-don't-you-come-for-tea, if you were in stench alley? I think not. On top of that, I had to keep one eye on my stuff (five bars of nutritious soap made from goat dairy and grains, and new socks), one eye on traffic (although my shirt was a good substitute cone), and my third eye of loving-goodness-toward-the-universe focused serenely above this quagmire of shite (in all fairness, the alley was relatively clean).

Clearly, my style palate has been cleansed by my previous bout of minimalism. I embraced this assemblage of vitamin D whose yang-y bursts of colour found syncopated harmony in the alley's yin-y concrete squalor. This precision silhouette stance shows you the, uh, silhouette.

I fired the photographer, the traffic coning specialist*, the stylist, the garbage wrangler, and the location scout. I kept the gaffer - I'm really good at gaffes. *that's a real movie biz job, union wages

What on earth am I wearing?

• flagrantly floral thrifted Versace pants
• platform runners on super discount from Topshop (they don't offer so many huge discounts at my local store anymore; yup, they suck you in and then leave you high and dry, high and dry, my friends)
• ruffled twisted citrus thrifted satiny blouse
• magic loupe
• thrifted shaggy green coat
• my serious shady-day cycling sunglasses no longer used for cycling

The sun was like thin gruel off and on today, weak, beige, runny, lacking in nutrients, "Please, sir, can I have some more?" He said, "Eat your soap." Freak.

A cool colour snap

Stains, tiny holes, and a frightening little rrrip as I reached behind to pull the zipper through the home stretch. Truly, pulling rear zippers and reaching for things are the biggest dangers when wearing fragile vintage pieces; I should have known better... But all these little flaws are the tangible tracks a life lived in this gorgeous maxi, which features an empire waist, a silky pink lining, and a flowing sheer shell with appliqued flowers. Probably once wore to a wedding or Sweet 16 party, I punked it up for day wear with my platform runners and diamond-encrusted meteorite pendant. For such a demure dress, she sure makes a racket with that silk-on-silk swishing.

Below is evidence that I actually wear the clothes I photograph in the garbage atelier, concrete stairwell, and parking garage. My friend Sharron, whom I've featured on my street style blog a couple of times, emailed me this photo she snapped on her phone on the sly as I was leaving the coffee shop. Thanks, Sharron. And maybe you also recognize my partner in style parkour adventures in the background. 

You can see from this photo how the dress billows so sweetly. Some clothes are made to move, others to photograph; this is definitely the former. I had so many compliments, probably a record - the positive energy swirling around these fluttering flowers is undeniable. I'm glad I finally took her for an outing.

thrifted vintage homemade maxi party dress

platform runners

carrying thrifted denim jacket

vintage sunglasses on my head

gifted toolbox hand bag from O

meteorite diamond-encrusted pendant, vintage, gift

magic loupe made by O

spare kitty head from my journal

I realized on my way home that this is the last formal day of summer in this hemisphere (written Sat), which got me thinking about how when autumn hits people suddenly start wearing clothes the colour of detritus, decay, mould, and fungus. During dark months wouldn't it make sense to wear clothes that are bright and cheerful to counteract the negative suction power of dark coldness? Or maybe people can't stand colour in winter because it would be mean, like a taunt from sunnier days. In reality, long ago we probably dressed in colours to match the seasons as camouflage so we wouldn't get knocked off by enemies or hungry beasts. Where I live now, that's not too much of a concern, but the hiding behaviour persists. I like the colours of decay too, but nothing beats the buoyancy of a full-blast colour snap.

I'm linking this outfit up to Patti's Visible Monday at Not Dead Yet Style, her blog. (Whew, I almost forgot to activate the link.) It's the perfect garden party dress. I have pearls, white pointy shoes, and white gloves for this dress, but I like the sweet punk-ass version waaay better. Maybe I'll see you there. Thanks for stopping by Bag and a Beret, my sweets! 

Faking colours and re-runners

I'm linking to Share-in-Style: White with Mis Papelicos and Sheila for Shoe Shine at Ephemera. I linked these platform runners before (Shoe Shine #3) but I'd rather do re-runners than nothing at all. And as for white, although the dress is salmon pink, I edited it to be white, which counts. Call my lawyer.

The dress is a thrifted vintage dream, possibly a wedding dress, made by Tachi Castillo in Mexico. The undulating tide of pink is more than I am used to but the crackle nature of the stretchy poly/cotton fabric cancels out the femininity. (Curtise posted a lovely crackle-free garment today.) The beautiful lacy bits are see-through so I wore my skinny red tartan jeans under it. Of course, that's my turnip head.

And a reminder:

The VOGOFF submission deadline is only TEN days away!!

Get out your cameras. Right this minute! Or not...

What I wore to the Hamptons

What I wore to the Hamptons sounds better than what I wore to the Downtown Eastside of Vancouver, the former being a playground of the rich in New York state, the latter, one of Canada's poorest neighbourhoods where my favourite fabric shop, Dressew, and many other cool hangouts are located. 

This feels like an outfit of indifferent decadence. When I was young(er) I had a few wealthy male friends who would wear the most buttery-soft expensive chinos with navy deck shoes/no socks. I loved how the pants slouched in their fit and had such a worn look even in their newness. Sigh. Well, I found my own variation of this look below, silk/linen blend trousers, fully lined, two sizes too big, $5, and a soft wool turtleneck like new, $5, also too big. Ironically, if I had gone out to buy these items new (wouldn't happen) I would have searched the racks for my correct size because I could afford not to make a sizing "mistake." But having the freedom that accompanies having no money for such things and only one size available, I could afford to take a chance, which was in fact fulfilling the image of insouciance I had all along.

This is what I wore yesterday.

I enjoyed this outfit a lot, let me tell you, flowy, floral, frigging faboo. It's more like Honolulu on acid than the Hamptons, although the platform runners are the same. My hair apparently ran away to be an extra on the TV reality show Swamp Monsters, or was it Duck Dynasty? I'm still waiting for a postcard. 

For my Hamptons outfit, is it weird that I wanted to recreate a man's look? Do you ever do that, recreate the look of a friend you've had or the ambiance of certain times of your life? Usually I don't. But I enjoyed this little trip.

AND...a word about VOGOFF

I had a heck of a time coming up with a theme for this issue and finally settled on fact, fiction, fraud. Basically, it's "be what you want to be." I have realized that showing ourselves in the context of otherness may be limiting, that we need room also to express our strength on its own terms. I'm not pissed off at fashion magazines or the people who read them and I know many women of towering strength who wear neutrals. I'd just like VOGOFF to be a forum for the voices that are excluded in mainstream media, whether it's in style, opinion, or lifestyle, funny or serious. This issue will be a huuuge grab bag, but the VOGOFF after this, if there is one, can be something completely different again because there are no rules.

Thanks to those of you who have already sent in your work. I am floored. It feels like The Freakish Yellow Skirt, except with your own pieces. Incredible!

Deadline: I'm hoping to have everything in by the end of July. That should give you lots of time to procrastinate, like I always do, with the issue coming out in August.