July blogger meetup in Vancouver!

Aaaack! The International +40 blogger brawl meetup in Vancouver is SOON!

So far, about 25 bloggers from around the world will be descending on my fair city. And I challenge those of you who have a passion for dressing up to make this the most stylish convergence of +40 women Canada has ever seen. (Believe me, it won't be hard, especially in Vancouver - even with practical walking shoes.) Maybe you'll inspire me to restart my street style blog!

Many of you are staying at the Blue Horizon Hotel downtown. Imagine the pyjama parties, the junk food, the imbibing, and the blackmail photo ops! Partaking in such childish behaviour of course will be at your discretion, or lack thereof, although it's possible we'll be too wiped out to keep our eyes open past midnight. We'll blame it on jet lag, shall we, despite the fact I live here.

Meeting you will be like meeting celebrities. Miz Bagg is, of course, non-plussed by the whole thing seeing as how her entire life is about ego and celebrity. She recently invited me on set for the Vancouver photo shoot of her friend, who hitched a ride back to town on the private Bagg Jet after wrapping up a sold-out concert tour of Europe. Imagine the sound of my jaw hitting the floor when I heard the friend's name: Sue of A Colourful Canvas.

This is Sue of A Colourful Canvas.

Well, that is the Sue I knew at any rate. All light and sunshine and creativity... It turns out she has a secret life, a darker life, a lewd life as a nasty international rock guru and top spokesmodel for hit products. Rumour on set was that Nike has just signed Sue for their new campaign: Don't do it!!

Sue's signature snarl. I know - can you believe it?

Really, at every turn it was "*&%$ this" and "#$!#* that." She's the only person I know, except Diavola, who can hold her own, expletive-wise, with Miz Bagg. Attitude, I've never witnessed anything this extreme.

In the middle of the shoot, without warning, Sue disappeared into her trailer with Miz Bagg and several roadies and photographers for a couple of hours, for "a nap." When she finally tumbled out, she gave me the finger (below)! And Miz Bagg mooned me (sorry, no photo).

I managed a few days ago, through Miz Bagg's assistant Enid, to get my hands on a mock-up of a print ad featuring one of the afternoon's shots, which will headline an orange juice campaign in the UK later this year. Apparently, Sue was paid over 5 million euro by Orange Growers of the Arctic for this endorsement. That's Sue flashing the crew! Sue leads the negative advertising trend - in fact, she pioneered it with Miz Bagg.

Bwa-ha-ha!! I had so much fun on this shoot. I happened to have a couple of wigs in my bag when I met Sue for coffee (who doesn't?), and I was wearing the robe. On the shoot I kept yelling at Sue (the fan was loud), "Look angry! Look pissed off! You're a b*tch! You're a b*tch!", which only made us laugh more. I'm sure people in the highrises around us were entertained: me, stumbling in my high geta sandals then crouched on the ground very pro-like, trying not to get piss hand, and Sue, flapping in front of the high-power air vent asking, "Do I look angry?" 

We also got lots of excellent glam shots - Sue posted a couple here - but in this post I chose to share the other Sue. (FYI, Sue said it's okay so we're still friends. Right, Sue?!)

For me, the point of the meetup is something like what these photos are. An escape. A holiday. A time to play and get to know each other better. To explore.

If you're thinking of joining the meetup, it's time to get on it! Suzanne needs your information as soon as possible, at least before July 15, so she can organize everything. And don't worry; if Miz Bagg scares you, there are all kinds of women coming with a variety of interests and talents. I'll be there, me, Melanie. I'm not sure if Miz Bagg's schedule permits. And Sue will be there, the good Sue. And of course, Suzanne, not sure which one. Heh.

FULL MEETUP DETAILS ARE HERE, 
Suzanne Carillo's blog.

See you later? 

Fake life imitates art in a fake life, and Hat Attack! Second try...

Oops, I deleted my whole post by mistake. So... 

NOW I'M REDOING IT!!! THAT'S MY DISRUPTION!!!!

Wearing thrifted mustard muppet coat, thrifted hard-worn tie-dyed cotton top, thrifted stretch tartan skinny jeans, black glitter platform shoes, thrifted silk scarf. Kitty is wearing whatever he likes. I don't remember what caused the disruption (yeah, because I have a new one) - probably a screaming child - but I do remember tearing down the highway in Kitty's red Bugatti before we hightailed it back to Carnegie Hall for his concert. Good times, friends.

Hello harlots - Today I unveil the newest trend which I, moi, have created in my genius-infected brain. Since my fired incompetent assistant Enid is locked in VOGOFF's closet, she pathetically failed to escape and restock my hair products. What choice did I have but to hang upside-down for this photo to achieve hair volume? The Boys are on their way over with the inversion harness on wheels, a hoist, and a truck to take me shopping. I call this "Eco Hair" - volume without the mess. When I think of all nature's precious and usually cute creatures I am saving by hanging upside-down and not using nasty, vile hair products I shudder and a tear escapes my eye and rolls into my eyebrow. My processional route is sterilized in advance but you unfortunates can use Eco Hair to sweep your floors and those little pennies that get stuck in your tangles may help you with the groceries. Poor dears. Ba-bye! Miz Bagg, Your Bagness.

I thought it would be fun to imitate Anne's awesome sketch of Miz Bagg that she posted at Spy Girl so I hung upside down off the table because, seriously, I didn't want to put product in my hair. Not comfortable - product or pose! I had to run and fling on a 10-sec timer. My sunglasses, the biggest pair I have, kept falling up over my forehead - not a usual problem. The dress, though, is divine, a thrifted maxi, made in France, wool/mohair blend with sparkly gold-thread serging and an elegant hoodie hanging up by my ear. I am using the hoodie as a poor excuse to join Judith's Hat Attack 21 at Style Crone. Thanks, Judith!

The view from my coffee shop, one of Vancouver's most upscale clothing department stores, Holt Renfrew:
"ARE YOU AN CON: Legendary moments await." I thought, what an interesting campaign, even though they got the "an" wrong, until I realized that the "I" was concealed by the light post. Boring after all.

So my upside-down photo is life imitating my fake life imitating art imitating Anne's fake life in her fake journal. I love the fake journal project Anne does, and how thrilled I was to see that she had incorporated Her Supreme Betchness in her story of Enid. Thank you, Anne. You have revived Miz Bagg! I look forward to more of Enid's adventures. Tee hee.

And - "What? More jeans? Stop! Stop already!" Blame it on the runners. I have been enjoying the fleet-footed freedom of these shoes, the knowledge that I could bolt at the drop of a chocolate - to catch it before it hits the ground. The words alone - sneakers, runners - conjure up dusty playgrounds, monkey bars and squeaks on gym floors.

These are my thrifted black jeans, $5, thrifted black blazer that fits like a glove, $5, thrifted man's shirt, more than $5, scribbled-on thrifted sneakers, colourful Harlequin socks, retail, and of course my magic loupe from O. A neighbour said I looked boyish in this. Coltish is good too. Not to be confused with the old grey mare. Or mutton. Or any other farm animal. Although I am good at bull.

Thanks for all your comments in my last post about IG. Lots to think about. Also, I'm not ready to give up on blogging.

PS If you have published and then accidentally lost a post, search for it online and you will find the cache that you can copy. Whew!