Furry things, dingle bits, and Turnipheads

I went down to the scary storage locker where my alien pods are hibernating, pods referring of course to my clothes in their vacuum-sealed space bags. There was definitely a rustling sound, maybe even muffled giggles, as I tugged open the padlock. 

The key to survival in there is to be quick and efficient and carry a big vacuum hose. It helps that I have an Excel spreadsheet now that catalogs my clothes by description and bag number. 

One reason I went down is to pull out this ice-blue faux fur because I knew it would go magnificently with a new addition to my closet - a luxury bag from Jamin Puech Paris. It was a gift, a mini collaboration, but rest assured my opinions are my own: I LOVE IT!!

The next photo is what happens when I get excited by a new bag - I wave it about so much you can't really see it! Please kindly skip to the photo after this one for a calmer view.

This bag, Chair, is from their Tingshas line. Dingle bits, velvety softness, high-factor swingability, and satisfying planetary orbs that click open and shut. It is a truly unique piece of handbag art, which is why I was so happy to accept this collaboration. Even the packaging was exquisite.

And look, the cuffs of my thrifted Scotch & Soda blouse match the dingle bits perfectly. Spooky, right? Hahaha. And I didn't even plan it. I'm also wearing my fake stripper track pants that zip all the way down the sides and my brown cowboy-style booties.

No one comes between me and my Jamin Puech. 

Seriously, this is a fine bag and I know I'll use it often. It was very difficult choosing which bag I want - all their designs are absolutely stunning, and I don't say that lightly. Go have a look and you'll see what I mean. Thanks, Jamin Puech. 

And below is the Chair with another outfit. I like this pairing equally well, especially with the silk velvet scarf in the mix.

Now moving along. Tra-la-la, tra-la-la, lounging on the concrete steps in outdoor wear, as one does, leafing through my journal.

What am I wearing? All things from my closet, thrifted or gifted:

• black-and-white graphic print vintage coat with red lining from my friend Su
• heavyweight vintage jacquard pants 
• men's pointy brown shoes 
• silk velvet scarf
• "Soho" glasses, gift from Vint and York in NYC in the summer
• Jamin Puech Paris handbag

Just so you know, below is the kind of sketch that litters my journals. I have hundreds of them over many years, mostly featuring Turniphead (that's me), wearing the same thing I was wearing that day, and Kitty, often Royal Kitty, wearing whatever strikes my fancy. If you spot me in a downtown cafe, chances are I'll either be sketching or colouring one of these with pencil crayons.

I also wore this black-and-white pattern-mix outfit a week ago to a Uniqlo store in Burnaby, which is a 30-minute transit ride from downtown Vancouver. Uniqlo is an international fashion retailer headquartered in Japan and I went there not necessarily to shop but to hunt for a photo of me from a global print and commercial campaign I did with them earlier in the summer. And look! 

My friend Elizabeth (IG and website) accompanied me and took the photo. I was featured in the stretchy pants section. Awesome! Hahaha. 

I hadn't mentioned the campaign to anyone because I didn't know what happened to it. Then, cincinnata_demetria, whom I know from IG, wrote that she had seen me in the Amsterdam Uniqlo. What a surprise! When I asked, she kindly sent me a photo that I posted on my IG, HERE. 

That same night, people O and I know in Japan also called, surprised to have seen me in their local Uniqlo as well.

Of course I was excited and contacted Greetje of No Fear of Fashion, who lives not too far from the Amsterdam store, and she generously went down and took a bunch more photos. Huge thanks to Greetje! And to her husband Ron, who drove the getaway car. She has a funny story about that on her blog, HERE. One of the photos she sent me is below. 

That's me in the commercial above the photo too. I'm an architect. Greetje didn't even notice until she got home that I was in there and she'd captured my scene by chance. I'm not keen on the camera angle in the ad and told Greetje, DO NOT USE!!, but I'm over it now, it's life. This was an awesome shoot. 

That's about it from here. I'll finish with this photo - showing the wall who's boss. ???!!!

I'm wearing a short lurex dress with sport-style neck and cuffs. Those are Zohara tights, which they sent me over a year ago. They have a great collection. 

Nothing else to say really. I'll end with this little journal sketch.

It's a giant cat or a little tree. You decide. A windy autumn day. 

I'll link up with Patti at Not Dead Yet Style for her Visible Monday, and Catherine at Not Dressed as Lamb for her #iwillwearwhatilike. 

Thank you for visiting!!! I hope you all have a stellar week. Until next time...

What to wear in a stairwell

Think outside the box? 

I think not!

Wearing: Calvin Klein linen dress with very long ties - Sandra of @standard.deviations pointed it out to me years ago at Value Village - and knee-high Converse runners with cheaty rear zips and lunch-bag hand bag, both from My Sister's Closet. Plus magic loupe and ring from O, of course.

Donna Quixote battles a wall in knee-high sneakers. 

No sword, but she has a fabulous trailer lunch-box hand bag.

Most of my photos are in the box. I am in the box. My brain is in the box. 

My imagination is wherever the feck I want it to be. 

Always. 

For example, below it looks like I'm in the box, but in fact I'm driving a classic convertible Bugatti through Monaco. Oh, and there's my yacht on the horizon. Is that Claude in the skiff coming to pick me up? I think it is! I shall wave in my traffic cone dress. I hope O got back from his atelier in time. (Do you see what I see now?)

Those are my red sandals and dress from Talize thrift store, belted this time (unbelted here), and my happy doggy scarf, and sunglasses. Of course, I'm also wearing my magic loupe and ring from O, which you can buy HERE.

Next, when using one's wristwatch teleportation device to travel to Paris for dinner, one must bring a lunch-bag hand bag for unexpected delays. 

My travel wear consists of an NLST "Harem Flightsuit" (here) - how perfect! - my radiation-proof mega honkin' sunglasses, my pseudo-gladiator sandals, in case the teleporter transports me to that gladiator era by mistake, magic loupe and ring for magic, and my lunch-bag hand bag again.

What?! They kicked me off the teleporter! 

I pay extra for First Class molecular handling!! 

Massive delay. And the only things in my lunch bag were inedible, unless you count my lipstick - but only in super-duper emergencies.

Thank goodness I'm in the box so I can set things aright!

Boxes get such a bad rap. 

Kitties love them, and so do I. They play in boxes, hide in boxes, and even poop in boxes - although I don't do that. What geometric shape do you think inside of, outside of? It's a ridiculous question of course.

I'm linking up with Patti's Visible Monday, Not Dead Yet Style, and Catherine's #iwillwearwhatilike at Not Dressed at Lamb. I know I'll see you there! Hugs.

======================================================================

AND OTHER BREAKING NEWS:

➽ Sylvia of 40+ Style has featured me on her blog today, HERE, 

"Having fun with makeup and hair – A beauty interview with Melanie"

The interview is part of her Beauty series. I had fun answering her questions - it's not a topic I think about much. And there are a few never-before-seen photos of me. Thank you, Sylvia. I owe so much of my confidence to you! Check out the other articles in her series. So good.

➽ Greetje, of No Fear of Fashion, another favourite blogger, has translated from Dutch to English the piece about me in the Marie Claire Netherlands May print magazine. I've added it to my previous post, HERE, to accompany the original article. Huge hugs to you for doing that!

➽ My friend Judy has launched a blog - Fancified. She is a madly talented upcycler and crown-maker. Case in point below: a repurposed jacket "hot off the waffle iron." 

You'll have to go to her blog to see all the AMAZING detail. I've featured her before on my street style blog, Culture Serf, HERE. I encourage you to have a look. I know you'll be inspired by her creativity.

That's all!! For now. 

Dang! I keep forgetting to do my flat lays!

My Seinfeld life, the highs and lows

As I stepped off the curb at the light downtown, something shiny on the ground caught my eye. It was a big slimy slug. OHMYGOD, that poor slug is going to roast in the sun. I continued walking. I thought, I should have brought my little water spritzer, I could refresh him. But maybe that would accelerate his dessication. How horrible!

Or maybe I could assist him (obviously male) into the sewer drain half a foot away. But, geez, who knows what's in there. That could kill him! Plus, I have no tissues to carry him anywhere. How did he end up so far from his leafy soil home? Maybe someone will step on him! Usually my heart is not so soft towards invertebrates, but this little guy was so sad.

By this time I had been swept across the street in a throng of pedestrians and, let's not kid ourselves, I knew I would do nothing. I felt a bit bad and continued on my way.

And then it happened. Weird sickening redemption - what if it wasn't a slug?! [caution for next bit] Maybe I was feeling bad for not spritzing and refreshing and transporting a loogie?! Or worse! GAAAA!! I think I guffawed and choked at the same time. For real. It was only a glimpse after all. Of course I had to go back for confirmation. Hahaha. No way. (I just wrote that to see how screwed up you think I am.)

Then, when I got a block from home I saw a white-haired man stuck in the driver's seat of his shiny red Lamborghini. The uniformed valet from the swanky restaurant across the street, where the driver was probably headed for lunch, was bent over him, tugging to get him out. I thought, wow, there are worse fates than being stuck your Lamborghini. Even if I had it, my water spritzer wouldn't help this case. I hoped the valet got a good tip.

So that's the high and low of things from here. It's an exciting Seinfeld-esque life.

This new pink flamingo top is organic, so organic I could probably eat it, the danger there being I'd end up naked on top and run the risk of developing a taste for fine fabrics. Heh.

I got lots of positive attention when I was wearing this. I'm not sure if it was for the top alone or for how the top made me feel that brought it on. Probably a bit of both. Thanks, Greetje, No Fear of Fashion, for this linen flamingo top, which was designed and made by her niece who does this sort of thing for a living at Päälä. This shirt has positive vibes aplenty. By the way, this is unpaid, non-sponsored praise.

The pants are by Free People, bought at a big sale at a consignment shop. Elastic waist - we all know what that means: Bring on the buffet!! They are magnificently flared and wave like a queen. The thrifted jacket may be vintage, I can't really tell. Maybe not. But I still like it and it's getting a lot of wear lately.

I'll post the VOGOFF details in the coming days.

Soon it's the weekend. Hm, I'm not sure why that makes me happy - it has no impact on my daily schedule anymore. I guess it's just tradition to love it. Have you got any traditions like that?

When good compliments go bad

The DIY text on this dress was inspired by a comment on this blog by Sue of You Can Call Me Sue and lyrics by hip hop group N.W.A. in "Gangsta Gangsta": "Do I look like a mutha feckin' role model?" 

This is the first of two tank maxis I farked with the Ted Baker London, Vancouver, store pre-opening media event in mind (2nd one here). I wore neither, but this one really got me thinking about role models, so-named for their character, not really looks, which is what makes this line so interesting.

In Vancouver, I am constantly on the look-out for style icons, and if I see people who dress in a cool way, I want to tell them so. That's how my street style blog, now dormant - at least until the blogger meetup in July - was born. But I've had a few cases where my good compliments have gone bad, real bad.

ME: Excuse me, can I just say I think you look fantastic! I love your [dress/pants/top]!

PERSON: I don't need your validation of my looks! Who do you think you are to judge me like that? 

ME: Oh. Um, I just like your style. I like your shoes too. But, uh, I'll just be on my way. Have a nice day. Oops, that was wrong, to prejudge you as a person capable of having a nice day. Sorry.

This exact dialogue never happened, but the thought bubbles were easy to read. Have we become so politically correct that I can't even compliment someone on their style without causing offense!? Most of us have probably been raised to think compliments are a good thing. Greetje, on her blog No Fear of Fashion, put it well here:

Compliments make people happy. Therefore… you should pay people lots of compliments. Sincere ones. They will not only lighten up that person's day but will also give you a happy feeling.

Sometimes I have coffee here. Other times I rush by. 

Maybe you also know the saying, "If you can't say anything nice about someone, don't say anything at all." So now what? If you can't say anything, don't say anything? Puh.

I am not going to stop telling people I'm wild about their style. That would be like telling me I can't, say, dance anymore (even though it would be a kindness to humanity). And since I can't prejudge who is going to be a prick about a compliment - I can never tell - I'm going to keep on dropping compliments like f-bombs all over the city. Be forewarned.

Wearing:

• DIY text, tank maxi dress, painted with acrylics
• thrifted long-sleeve boat neck top
• black jeggings, sample sale
• geta-style sandals, discount Topshop 
• magic loupe, gift from O
• vintage sunglasses, $2 at vintage store closing sale years ago

I took the second two photos when I got home from my inspiration walk, when my hair had become horned.

Have you ever had a person snap at you for giving them a compliment or is this just a Vancouver thing? I'd be relieved if it were the latter. (Please contact Miz Bagg for Sour Biatch Cafe franchise opportunities.)

Silks and sci fi

One of my neighbours was in that movie, Chupacabra vs. The Alamo. A chupacabra is a demonic-looking beast that preys on outdoor animals. The creature sucks all the blood from its victims through surgical-like puncture wounds. Some say the chupacabra is a contemporary legend; others, especially operators of souvenir shops, swear they are real. Whatever the case, they are excellent fodder for a B movie. You can read about chupacabras here. 

:::: hip-slung silk blouse as skirt, silky golden top, pastel yellow tights, ostrich ankle boots, similar to here ::::

::: the "chupacabra sheriff look" is edited from a photo posted here ::::

I sometimes enjoy a B sci-fi/monster movie, especially if it's raining outside, I have a steaming mug of hot chocolate, and a mountain of pillows and junk food, but I miss the days before computer graphics. No realistic gore/slime fest created in a CG lab compares to my imagination when it comes to freaking myself out, which is why I also prefer books to their film version. Below is one of my favourite sci-fi clips, the running scene starting at 20sec, from Ultra Q, a Japanese offshoot series of Ultraman.

I'll be linking this up to Sacramento's Share-in-Style: Autumn on her blog Mis Papelicos. This outfit counts because it is in a favourite autumnal colour of decay, gold, and it also has blue, the colour of mould on cheese, a decrepit colour snap. Curtise's post featuring outfits in the colours of mould, decay, detritus, and fungus was truly inspiring at The Secondhand Years. I bet you've seen it already; look here if you haven't.

B movies: yay or nay? Seen any notable ones lately, something worthy of a slacker afternoon?

Above is what I wore today, Sunday. The tunic/dress says "Happy" on it. Having a clothing manufacturer factory-stamp "Happy" onto its fabric makes me feel as joyful as having a bank machine tell me to smile. I shall change this writing posthaste to Hoppy or Hippy, anything but Happy. That's just me, even though, thankfully, I don't object to the emotion itself. Everything here is thrifted, except the shoes (ultra discount) and the magic loupe from O. These skinny jeans, made in Dublin, are plaid so I shall link them up to Anne's 52 Pick-me-up: Plaid at Spy Girl.

Patti (Not Dead Yet Style) and Greetje (No Fear of Fashion) have both worn Turnip Head. Hee hee. I like their own heads better, who wouldn't?, but Turnip had a good time.

If you haven't seen Charlie in the Freakish Yellow Skirt, you'd best make tracks to her blog, Fur Earwig. Now that's what I call Happy styling!

Borrow the Turnip Head!

If you need a Spare Head,

........................LOOK NO MORE!..................... 

[Edit: New larger Turnip Head offered as well]

If your own head has gone on holiday, leaving your outfit photo in the lurch, your troubles are over!
Turnip Head will be happy to perform your noggin' duties.

Save your choice of image below to your desktop and slap it on your body. eeeasy. The image is png format with a transparent background so it can be integrated into your photo with minimal photo editing. Resize as needed. The small size is, well, small, and LARGE size is, um...

small size

obviously, large size

The head is rather sketchy, but if you require a spare head, no doubt you are also rather sketchy, my friend. Turnip Head may not perform as well as your normal head, but at least she's got ATTITUDE. 

Please kindly include a credit for Turnip Head with a link/mention, for example, "Spare head courtesy of Melanie at Bag and a Beret." It's much easier to send my heads around the world than clothing. 

If you use Turnip Head, send me an email with the link and I shall list it on this page.

Good luck. Happy head hunting!

1. Patti at Not Dead Yet Style, Turnip Tete Cecile of Greenwich Village 
2. Greetje at No Fear of Fashion, Black Linen Dress with Booties
3. ArgentGal at Whimsy on a Whim, Zombie Turnip Head Wants to Eat Your Brains!
4. Pao at Project Minima, David Bowie: Fashion Icon, Chicago Museum of Contemporary Art
5. Aya of Couturgatory wore the Turnip Head in her Twitter photo
6. Shelley of Forest City Fashionista

This image, based on a work by Banksy, the British grafitti artist, was sent to me by TT, the same man whose comment sparked the Travelling Yellow Skirt Freak Show. This was in fact the first Turnip Head submission I received.

...............................................................

How to:

I just discovered that Pic Monkey has an overlay feature AND there is a tutorial on how to do it HERE. How easy is that?!! I haven't tried it, but I bet you will get great results. Good luck!

Yellow Skirt Freak Show Update!! and more...

PETER: Who is that woman?!
THIJS: I have no idea but get rid of her. Nobody is looking at us when she's standing there.
PETER: Shameless attention hog. Such a poser.
THIJS: Look who's talking Mr. Fancy Pants with frilly lace around his neck.
PETER: Oh shut up, you're wearing one too.
THIJS: Hm, yes, I can't help admiring it. But I mean reeeally, that yellow abomination. It's ghastly.
PETER: Nobody usurps our manly authority and greatness.
BOTH: Security! Arrest that woman!!

It was bound to happen - 

the travelling yellow skirt becomes 

High Aaaaah-t, that's HIGH art

flouncing, billowing, flowing regally

through Rijksmuseum

Fearless     G r e e t j e  of

N O   F E A R   OF    F A S H I O N

G O!   G O   N O W !!

________________________________________________________________________

Thank you so much, Greetje. It's confirmed that the Freakish Yellow Skirt is high art, hogging all the attention in the Rijksmuseum in Amsterdam. WOW. It's a fantastic feeling to know that everyone's work has been showcased in one of the world's great galleries. Stunning photos! You MUST see them.
And the journey continues...

In other news...

Yesterday's outfit: thrifted spangly gold top, black camisole, white long-sleeved T-shirt with DIY holes cut in the armpits, thrifted businessy pinstriped pencil skirt, thrifted black army boots, black tights, toolbox handbag, magic loupe from O. 

A garbage room atelier is a poser's best friend. Todays' outfit: thrifted vintage floral jumpsuit, shaggy green boot things, groovy thrifted chain belt. I'm linking one of these up to Patti's Visible Monday at Not Dead Yet Style. See you there. Miz Bagg is back in town and SCREAMING for attention.