Slack-jawed in a shaggy coat, and other important things

Wearing this inhuman outfit, I went to the park for photos. There were lots of cats there. And I seem to be walking on water. Handy, because it never stops frickin' raining!! 

It's a magic cat with orange/yellow eyes. I'll call him Pyewacket, after actress Kim Novak's Siamese familiar spirit in the '58 movie Bell, Book and Candle, clip here. Ms. Novak plays a cool Manhattan witch who, sadly, becomes a normal, boring person after falling in love with a spineless man played by James Stewart. Sigh.

I looove this outfit. The jacket and vintage humongoid palazzo pants seem to match, and then I wore ruffles and that shaggy vest, newly sprung from its space bag. And the elastic corset belt of course makes any outfit better. 

Fierce, right? Or maybe I simply ate too much chocolate. 

Below, a different outfit featuring the classic stupefaction pose - you know, where you open your mouth a bit. Who knew that looking slack-jawed would be a thing? Of course this look is not unfamiliar to me; I just rarely do it for a camera. 

And I'm wearing white Manic Panic hair gel and white brows created with MAC chromacake. The lipstick, called Poe by Kat Von D, is almost black, but much of it had come off by the time I got home for photos. I belled the bottoms of these pants too. 

I learned this mouth pose from ingenue bloggers. It is the cousin of the half-mouth-droop, taught to me by Sue of A Colourful Canvas. And let's not forget the just-pulled-my-finger-outta-my-mouth pose. You can see my big fail here, last photo.

Lately I've seen bloggers rubbing or smooshing their moist lips suggestively with an index finger. Usually they have tousled, just-woke-up long hair too. Well, I think it's unfair that young bloggers get to hog all the "in" poses. It's time we short-haired (or otherwise), middle-aged bloggers moved in on these hot, hot, hot poses. 

Note the belled bottoms. The colour on the left is more accurate.

Until such happy day, though, at least I can do the one where you use your index and middle finger to strum your lips and make bub-bub-bub-bub sounds. Sophisticated, I know. Maybe I can make it a thing. Which brings me to the next pose...

It was Black Friday last week. In honour I present: the double-raspberry.

Below is the photo I put on IG. Zip it! Zip it good!

Black Friday - it sounds like a spell. It is a spell. You see a sign in a shop window that says 100% OFF STOREWIDE. You think, WOW, that's a great deal, I'll risk it. You go in. Bam, there's a wall of people windmilling their arms to grab, grab, grab. Hardly unexpected.

But where are the deals? Of course there's fine print: on selected items only.  If you're lucky there's a single cast-off on a rack in the very back for 80% off. Fortunately, I usually prefer these rejects, but it wasn't worth sticking around to find out. I sucked up the crowd buzz and left. 

A better view of those pants. Most of my shaggy apparel is out of storage now. In a pinch, I could hide a whole farmyard of animals in those pantlegs.

That's the end of this week's stroll through what I wore. It was US Thanksgiving, and I hope those of you who celebrate had a good one. It's the time to recount our blessings - there are so many. 

Have a good week everyone. Here's a link to Santana, Black Magic Woman, live in 1971. 

Yes, I think I'll also join Patti at Visible Monday, Not Dead Yet Style, and Catherine, #iwillwearwhatilike, at Not Dressed as Lamb.

Catwoman. And VOGOFF returns!!

Oh yes, I've got my happy dog head stuck out the pickup truck window while I boot down the highway, tongue flapping, spit flying, tail wagging. But you know what happens, right? Bugs. Lots of them, stuck to your tongue. Eat 'em or spit 'em out - does it matter? The point is, they're there. It also means bad hair. And the risk of road rage from the poor sods drenched in drool behind you. Tailgaters for real! Actually, I'm wearing a CAT HEAD, not a dog head.

Stink, stank, stunk! Back in the alley. Mind where you put your feet. No bugs on this tongue though. If she gives me any lip, I just zip it. That's my Route 66 jacket which I asymmetrized* with a diagonal zipper.

So what am I saying? Bliss is fleeting and it requires attention on the right things, kind of like that line in the Bill Cunningham documentary (NY street style photographer): If you look for beauty you will find it. 

It also involves taking a risk. If I focused on the bugs and bad hair and road rage, I'd never put my head out the window in the first place. The gamble that the open road will mask the taste of a fly or two makes me brave.

I bought this T-shirt at a Value Village shopping spree with Sandra of Standard Deviations (IG here) a couple of years ago. I just hauled it out of a space bag.

In celebration of the bliss in our midst, I'm doing another issue of the online magazine -

VOGOFF 

Pissed Off Towards Ecstasy or 

So Joyful It Frickin' Hurts

I could have done just the ecstasy/no-hurting part, but talk about boring. Eating and drinking and sex and sleeping, who wants to see that!? Heh. Besides, it doesn't exist in a sustainable form. And you'd get bored of it (yeah, you would!, stop arguing, Suzanne). And there'd be the indigestion, maybe a couple STDs, sleep disorders, and possible bankruptcy. And then lawyers. Well, and then you'd start looking for bliss in a bottle or thermos or 7-Eleven.

V O G O F F

The way I see it, life is a giant come here, come here, come here, get away, get away, get away, not a one-side-takes-all proposition. And usually, for me, my best work springs from a place of discontent or restlessness or just plain piss-offedness. The transformation from crap to rapture is powerful. Henceforth, I shall call it crapture. (Didn't Deborah Harry sing a song with that title? - I may have just ruined that song for you forever! Heh.)

Oh look, it's Batman and Cat Woman!! White, super-soft brushed cotton chinos, Tommy Hilfiger, thrifted $5, hip-slung, three sizes too big, not quite falling off, dreamy.

In blogging, I've gone through a spell of getting pissed off but I'm not sure at what. The homogeneity? The pressure to be extraordinary? To be special? To make money? Pfft. Maybe I'm tired of other people's drool on my own windows, not put there by bliss but carefully constructed illusions of bliss. Oh no!! It's FAKE SPIT!! That's where I draw the line! When you come here, believe you me, you only get the good stuff, the genuine spit.

So you want to VOGOFF with me this time? I'll post details about what to do later. Think about it, will ya's? The previous issues have had tens of thousands of viewers, truth. Not bad, right, for a bunch of non-conformicators*?

To see past issues, go HERE.

I'm linking this cool cat head up with Patti at Not Dead Yet Style and her weekly Visible Monday, and also Catherine at her weekly linkup #iwillwearwhatilike at Not Dressed as Lamb. See you there!

Mini Glossary
*non-conformicators: made-up word, noun, compound of non-conformist and fornicator
*asymmetrized: made-up word, verb, to make something asymmetrical
*overall meaning of this post: there's nothing to help you there. Heh.