From the boudoir to faux France

From the boudoir to the garden with huge honkin' plants. The leaves seem to embrace me, clearly unable to resist my vintage neon hot-pink robe by "Rhapsody of California made by Glazier," a phrase which must be said aloud with a haughty drawl each time I don this luxurious furry confection. I also memorably worn my Rhapsody when Shelley came to town in May 2016, post is here. 

"I am One with the Big Leaves" Photo by @vancouverbarbara

Now and with Shelley I was surrounded by big green vegetation wearing the Rhapsody. Are there strange forces at work with this robe - beyond its general fabulousness - that I don't know about?! Could this robe be opening some warped telepathic channel to our Jurassic herbal past!? Now I'm afraid to say the label name backwards. Who knows what would happen?

Shelley (Forest City Fashionista) and I goof around while feeling fabulous

The blouse is a chartreuse-y colour, very silky, with huge gathered sleeves, of course not visible here because they were smooshed in my robe. And I wore this awesome stretch floral maxi skirt and super-soft stretch leather booties, both from My Sister's Closet at one time or another.

But oh no! Do you see it? The huge honkin' camel nose? What are the odds? Giant leaves. Giant camel nose. And camel without the "ca" spells mel. Gaaaa!

Not only that, the nose's brand is - dah-dah-dummm - "totem." Is my spirit animal a camel nose? A Jurassic camel nose? Whoa, things are getting out of hand here.

In its undercover life, this is a mere courier bag. The long body strap is an upcycled seat belt, and the short handle on the flap is also seat-belt strapping. My laptop fits perfectly in there. Clever, right? Nothing suspicious there.

Of course I wore my magic loupe, which O made me. I never leave home without it. If you want to get louped like me, use the link in my sidebar to go to his Etsy store, OSK Micro-art Studio. His cool rings are there too.

You may now be asking yourselves, who let Mel into the peyote? Don't worry, I sobered up real quick when I...

...put on a little faux-French, which also required flattening my hair. This dress might be considered dour, drab, matronly or simply gross if it weren't for its extreme boxiness, which elevates it to the level of haute couture faux-French. Boxiness is a sure sign of $$$.

The dress came from My Sister's Closet. The bottom skirt half, with a single knife pleat on one side, a pocket on the other, and five gold buttons, is picky wool, and the top half is another kind of wool, yes, also itchy, but that's part of the iron discipline one may require to wear haute faux-French, n'est-ce pas?

I think this dress was made from two vintage pieces sewn together. There are no labels or notions, except for the buttons, to research. I bought another very similar dress a few months before this one. The top half looks hand-knit, black wool, and the bottom half is dove-grey Crimplene. Dreamy. But I think I'll upcycle it into a coat. I'll show you later.

I carried my toolbox hand bag, swiped from O after he removed the height gauge, opaque black tights, narrow men's pointy shoes in taupe/brown - they are much pointier than the picture above suggests. And I took my teacup carrier made from a wooden matryoshka. The sunglasses are Lagerfeld, darling, a gift.

That's all for this week. Not much to say. I am preoccupied. I'll tell you about what after Thursday, which is when I'll put up my next post.

I'm going to link up with Patti at Not Dead Yet Style, Visible Monday, and Catherine at Not Dressed as Lamb, #iwillwearwhatilike.

See youse guys later!! Get back to work!! Heh.

Special going-out pyjamas and vintage hat

Canada Day needed me downtown ASAP so I sprang into action.

Red! Red! I must have red, the colours of our flag. Swoosh swoosh swoosh - I ploughed my way through the closet. Nuthin'. So I went to the other closet. Swoosh swoosh swoosh. Zilch. So I went to another closet - no hangers in this one.

And aaaa (sound of angels), there it was. My soft, quality-cotton, red-and-white "pyjama" set, well, it was sold as a pyjama set even though each piece is by a different label. I think it could easily be leisure wear or, yes, Canada-Day wear.

I carefully applied red and silver glitter eyeshadow under my brows, on account of the flag issue, and towered up my hair. Then, when I was about to put on my Converse sneakers I remembered I should bring a scarf to protect my neck from the sun.

Back to the closet. Rummage rummage. And RRRrrrr! (sound of hard brakes) What's this?! My vintage hat, my long-lost vintage hat.

At the Orient Express station. "Porter, oh porter, can you please take my bags? But leave the phone. I need to call my manicurist and Jean-Jacques, captain of my gorgeous yacht." 

Tower hair be damned. You're goin' down! And on went the hat.

And be gone, sneakers! Quickly I strapped on my geta-style sandals and wide black belt, then the crown, this majestic chapeau. Thankfully, there were not high winds today - this hat's perch is rather precarious. There is a small elastic to help with hold though.

And the finishing touch was this wonderful teacup carrier I made a few years ago from a wooden matryoshka. O created custom brass hardware to twist the top securely onto the bottom, and for the inside I sewed a satiny red pouch to cushion my family heirloom teacup. Sometimes I use this carrier as a handbag.

A generous smudge of sunscreen on my nose, vintage sunglasses, camera. Done!

Hmm, shall I buy the paisley Dior gown or the black vinyl Chanel hot pants? Everything is so complicated. "Please, garçon, can you bring me another Russian mule?" 

Frankly, I had more fun getting ready to go out than actually going out. It was so crowded and hot at the main area of festivities that I was forced to shuffle. Shuffle?!! In a divine hat?! And my wondrous pyjama set? Don't be preposterous! 

COMMERCIAL BREAK 

just like real entertainment. 

I made a 10 sec video on how I do my tower hair. Skip it if you've seen it on Instagram. It's the same one. This was not sponsored, pffft. 

Back to regular programming - now that you're all stocked up on chips...

For daily wear I'll probably give the red eyeshadow a pass; it was simply a noble gesture. On any other day it would look like I haven't slept in a year or I've been in a barroom brawl with Suzanne fighting over her latest vintage finds. (Of course she wins but I grab some loot while she fist-bumps her fans, see HERE.)

One good thing was that Vancouver Convention Centre was open to the public. I could live in that room, except for the vacuuming and changing light bulbs problem. This is the biggest ballroom in the place with stunning views across Burrard Inlet to North Vancouver.

And below, a little more drama. Because it's fun.

Canada is 150 years old now as a country. That's not very old. And the US has its big Independence Day coming up on July 4, so the city is still hoppin' with revellers. Me? I'm just workin' and readin' (fiction, The Woman on the Orient Express, great cover) and sketchin' - and planning, always planning. And I met up with Vancouver Barbara this week too. See her on IG.

That's all. I have other photos but, really, you have been so patient with my overloaded posts lately I thought you deserve a break. I sometimes post outfit photos on my Instagram, ones that I can't fit into a blog post. If you're interested you can have a peek HERE.

I'll link up to Patti and Catherine again, at Visible Monday, Not Dead Yet Style, and #iwillwearwhatilike, Not Dressed as Lamb. AND I'm happy to be joining Judith at Style Crone for her Hat Attack #48. FINALLY, I'm wearing a hat. Cheers!

This post has been brought to you by the mischievous, often missing, letter G at the end of "ing."

Thanks for stoppin' by! Where have your clothes taken you recently?

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Edit: I almost totally forgot. I am in Silver Magazine, based in the U.K., an article called "The 50plus fashionistas." They put a huge photo of me with the headline. Heh. I look so serious but only because I am an extremely serious person. See it HERE.

That's all. I swear. I tried to keep this post short but look what I've done. I just keep dribbling.

Snapping back in pearls and bell bottoms

I've noticed as I've gotten older that when I pinch my skin and pull it out, it takes longer to snap back where it belongs. Why do this? Because I've seen other people do this. It's kind of like bothering a sore spot and saying over and over, "Ow, it hurts when I do that." ???

But I've also noticed that this snap-back thing is true about my face as well. When I smile about something during my downtown walks, my face takes longer to settle back into its resting diva state. Heh. I'll go blocks and blocks and totally startle myself when I realize that damned smile is still there!! Let's not talk about how this applies to my scowl face because...

...it's been a week of chaos with nature chasers to take the edge off as the result of a computer hard drive meltdown. Some things were backed up - yeah, like my BOWELS! with all this shite to deal with. I know I'll stumble across stuff here and there on USB drives as the days go by ("stuff" of course referring to my data, not bowels. Moving right along). And the tech guy who did last rites backed up a few things for us, essentials. It was like deciding what to pack in a capsule wardrobe for, say, Paris, and being charged by the hour after the trip is cancelled.

The only true and meaningful remedy was nature with pearls, pearls, and more pearls!! And a cute vintage wool crepe shift dress with glitter tights and pointy shoes. See how dainty I am? I've brought my teacup holder with me, the one I DIY-ed from a wooden matryoshka, and that's a family heirloom teacup.

See the monster with big eyes waving at me behind the fence?

But that's definitely not tea. Looks like I needed a little Extra Strength nature, some fermented organics with a kick. In fact, the cup was empty - even worse! Picture me wobbling and stumbling on kitten heels, fumbling with loupes and reading glasses, sinking in mulch, and then throwing myself awkwardly across these weather-soaked chairs before the 10-second warning on the camera self-timer went off - all of this while trying to keep my dress down and look aloof. I think I succeeded.

I had to face this direction on the chair because all the construction men were on the other side. Of course I lost all my photo editing software and video editing software. Pffft. It was time to upgrade anyway. These photos were done on the basic-est basic software - that's why I added so many effects, to make myself feel better. Look what I can do! Look what I can do! (Ow, it hurts when I do that.)

These heels were wicked leaf skewers. It was a fashion statement, all those golden maple leaves stuck to my heels. Very patriotic.

And below, more nature shots - my very cool striped vintage bell bottoms with a floral jacket and a Bowling-For-Dollars (name of American bowling game show) blouse. I intentionally pulled things from my closet that I thought would look putrid together. I really needed some fecking CLASH! I failed - it came out looking Gucci. I swear, that company has ruined the art of clash by making anything and everything go together. Puh.

During this shoot I thought it would be fun to do some stop motion shots of me throwing a bunch of leaves up in the air. You know: Hahaha!! I LOVE NATURE! Tralala! I set the self-timer and scrambled into position.

What I didn't know was that while the leaves looked dry and lovely on top, when I grabbed a huuge pawful I discovered they were half-rotted and wet on the bottom. And of course when I hear the camera beeping I can't shut off. Up went the rot pile and down it came again all over my head, probably with lots of critters too. None of the photos turned out. How poetic.

After that fiasco I moved locations. Behold!!

And then back in the stairwell below. Too much nature! This outfit was a no-brainer. The overalls said Not Plaid so I put on the tartan jacket for a "get it? get it? nudge-nudge" moment. I don't think anyone but me got it though and it left passersby worried about that puzzled, expectant, half-smirk look on my face, which didn't snap back at all! That's a blue silk blouse underneath. Everything is many sizes too large, except the jacket which I down-farked.

I call this outfit plaid/not-plaid undone, with reference to Canadian rock band The Guess Who and their 1969 hit "Undun." (here) She's come undone. Undone DIY jacket, undone DIY overalls with that gaping bib. At least my combat boots stayed tied, double knotted.

These photos are the first installment in Project New Leaf. I am venturing boldly where no middle-aged tween has gone before. Heh. A fresh slate is a good thing.

But I have to say that throughout this minor inconvenience my heart went out to a dearly loved member of our blogging community, Jessica Cangiano, author of Chronically Vintage, and her husband. All their worldly possessions, including her priceless collection of vintage clothing, were destroyed in a fire on October 13. Their dog escaped with them but their beloved cat went missing.

A crowdfunding page has been set up HERE to help them get back on their feet. And Jessica's friend Bonita of Lavender & Twill set up a Facebook page HERE for helping in other ways. The fire happened a couple of weeks ago, but the need I'm sure is as strong now as it ever was. Think about it, won't you?

And now one more outfit for the road:

This is my first back-to-nature photo. I'm living proof that when the going gets tough, the tough put on pearls and bell bottoms, grab a camera, shower themselves with decaying plant matter, frolic in mulch, clamber up hills and stairs, and pull out the fine china. I tried wielding a pitchfork and a very heavy watering can in my pearls, but I'll save those photos (on an external drive) for later. Heh.

Oh, and I forgot to mention that I met up a while ago with my friend Sandra, who is now active on IG here. You can see her rocking her drop crotch pants on my street style blog here. Mighty fine.

The end. Congratulations - you made it!

I'll be linking something up, of course, with Patti at Not Dead Yet Style, Visible Monday, and Catherine at Not Dressed as Lamb, #iwillwearwhatilike.

Have a good week. And remember: two steps forward, one step BACKUP!!

A fauvist pas is no mistake

I'm so relieved I got the memo: only wacky-ass colour allowed after Labour Day. Finally, a fashion rule I can live with - the fauvist pas is the height of seasonal norm-corny. 

I'm glad my camera has stop motion, otherwise I would remain a big blur. Are you arrested by my glow-in-the-dark, freeze-you-in-your-tracks gaze? And no look is complete without a custom teacup carrier, which I made a couple of years ago.

Details:

oversized cotton palazzo pants

vintage jersey top with pearl-ish buttons

magic loupe

thrifted D&G shoes

vintage sunglasses

teacup carrier I made from a matryoshka

This morning I specially put on these palazzo pants, which are often mistaken for a skirt, for the Share-in-Style: Skirt or Pants linkup hosted by Sacramento at Mis Papelicos and co-hosted by Susan of Une femme d'un certain âge. I'm wearing them backwards, but, really, there's so much fabric and they're already hip-slung large with a slouchy crotch at mid-thigh, who's to know? I liked the pattern of the back-facing waistband better at the front.

And a big THANK YOU! to the Invisible Woman for featuring me in one of her posts alongside some other very cool people. You can see it here. 

Have any of you seen the Dress Normal ads for Gap? I'm retching. Jean of Dross into Gold first alerted me to them and probably there are conversations about it raging everywhere and I'm the last to know... Thank goodness everyone has their own definition of normal: this post reflects mine. And thank goodness I have the freedom to express my normal every single day, whether in a fauvist pas piece or a seven-piece navy suit. That's all I have to say about that. (not reeeally)

Kiss of the drunken spider woman

I'm not in space any more but the retro rocket is still firing - thanks to this gift from the fabulous PAO from Project Minima: vintage maxi knit dress with an enormous brown velvet bow, once worn by her mother. Clearly we know that PAO is exploding with style and artistic talent, but now we also know that she inherited some pretty awesome get-your-groove-on genes from her mum.

It's too bad I didn't have a champagne glass as an accessory when I went out today, as surely the elevationary effervescence from a raised glass of bubbly would have flown me and this magical dress to my coffee shop in very good time and in much better style than Mary Poppins with her priggish umbrella; I would just have to hang on to the stem of the glass very tightly and watch out for spills. This dress made me feel very '60s martini/champagne party and bewitching at the same time. 

After my photo session I remembered a photo I had seen of Sonia Braga in her Spider Woman role from the movie Kiss of the Spider Woman. Our poses are similar but I think for my own good I'll end all comparisons there! Her web is very Alexander McQueen, don't you think?

My walk home was challenging: Step step step POSE. Step step step POSE. Sometimes you've just got to flaunt it; I'm glad I didn't pull a muscle from the exertion. "Here she comes, A-walkin' down the street, She gets the funniest looks from, Everyone she meets..." (Lyrics from the Monkees)

Details of the outfit:

• knit maxi dress, by Paul Stanley, New York, gift from the magnificent PAO
• maxi white nylon slip, thrifted (it came with my maxi sequin dress here)
• animal print shoes, Dolce and Gabbana, thrifted
• pantyhose(!), retail
• wooden matryoshka*, retail, Lee Valley Tools, refashioned by me, hardware by O

Accessory-wise I made do with the all-knowing-eye teacup carrier that I made from a wooden matryoshka - colour on one side (above), black and white on the other (below). The following photo also gives you a better idea of the fabric. The geometric pattern is a dark chocolate brown on ivory and there are textural horizontal lines throughout the fabric as well. I really needed the slip. (*edit: I learnt the correct word is matryoshka or matrushka, not babushka as originally posted)

So a huge thanks and hugs to PAO for making my magical journey possible today!! I couldn't have done it without you. This is my new absolute favourite dress!! 

My outfits often remind me of animals, plants, and even, in this case, a female spider. Do you make comparisons like that about your outfits? Curious. I hope you are enjoying your magical journeys in your fabulous frocks and slacks and what have you's. Breathe, breathe, breathe, aaaah.

(When I say today in this post, I mean yesterday; I wrote this up last night.)

Coming out of the clochet

Today I did something different. Usually I grab things in my closet pell-mell to create an ensemble that reflects an overall mood, giving equal weight to all parts. Today I chose a signature piece, an accessory, which singlehandedly seemed to embody everything I was feeling, and then constructed my outfit around it. I'm speaking here of my felt cloche with the flower. Poor little thing was buried in the closet.

This one little hat said it all: I wanted to partially shield myself during my walk (still in recovery mode) and I wanted to feel romantically 1920s. The colour palette is quiet, but my cloche demanded it be so. The jacket has convenient velcro tabs for closures on the front and the shift has a freighter neck, much wider than a boat neck, which is concealed by the jacket.

Details of the outfit:

• cloche, new decades ago from Sears(?)
• shimmery green jacket, thrifted, Value Village
• moss-grey shift, new years ago from Eatons closing-out sale, downsized 4 sizes
• black tights, "Frump" shoes, The Bay
• magic teacup carrier with heirloom teacup inside; I made the carrier, O did the hardware
• hand-me-over black vinyl bag that holds all my pencil crayons, sketchbooks, etc.
• Shar Pei wool sweater

I'm still recovering but managed a brief, low-intensity game of squash today. It felt good to MOVE!

And finally - 

Ms. Helga recently posted a brilliant photo essay of her drunken escapades under a tree. I immediately thought of this painting I did, although Helga was much more visually exciting than the waitress in this piece.

Title: "Becky had had trouble sleeping lately; she finally realized that it wasn't the coffee keeping her awake but something much more sinister." Acrylic on canvas paper, 18" x 24"

Have a great weekend everyone!

Scr-e-e-e-amingly Red

I was inspired by Citizen Rosebud and all her capes lately to wear this vintage red wool cape. The days are getting longer and warmer and I won't be able to wear it much more this season. My friend took this pic OUTSIDE. (Thank you!) I'm putting this in Patti's Visible Monday. Purple and red, ouch!

Details of the outfit:

• red vintage wool cape with faux fur trim from F as in Frank vintage shop on Main Street
• thrifted D&G side-zip slacks - the stitching was melting away so I had to resew all the seams. The fabric is like a lightweight ski-pant alien poly. Ooo, love it.
• long purple gloves from a neat boutique, I forget the name, but found the same gloves at Winners a week later for half the price! Rrrr.
• another teacup case I made, details in photo below. I love the spoon in the lid but I don't use it much.  I bought that Spode cup before my mum sent me my other most beautiful cup from a great, great, great grandmother (it's in an earlier post with my babushka teacup carrier). Of course coffee tastes better in a teacup that you bring from home in a groovy case. O made the hardware for me.

And another outdoor pic because it's such a novelty! We thought that was another person in the background - it's my reflection. We laughed.

And another pic to show my pants! It's a weird pose. These pants look great with some incredibly high-heeled, black pointy shoes, but my feet said "Non! Non!" today. In this pic, the stripe on the pants looks spider-webby.

I seem to have a few thrifted D&G pieces in my closet and it got me thinking, if there was a Lemonade Guide for Used Clothing, D&G would not be highly recommended; it seems to lose its value very quickly - I have found many pieces at low, low prices. What do you think? See you again soon.

Colour on Warp Factor 4

I love when colours clash (sometimes) - and today was one of those days!

Details of what I'm wearing:
gifted Cirque du Soleil sleeveless T
Fiorucci patterned jeans bought in Tokyo over 20 years ago
Miu Miu boots thrifted for $10 (and the next day I saw them in Vanity Fair, score!)
maxi cardigan with very useful pockets by Metallicus
ultra lucky life pendant hand-made by O for me, stainless steel

Apart from the pendant, my favourite thing here is my matryoshka teacup holder, which I made with the help of O who custom-made the brass fittings, as you can see in the photo below. Nothing like drinking my favourite coffee at my favourite coffee shop from my favourite teacup from my great great great grandmother, which my mother sent to me. Mmm. I have a couple other teacup holders that you'll see sometime here.

I'm excited to take part in Visibility Monday for the first time, although I've been following Patti's blog, Not Dead Yet Style, for quite a while. In fact, her blog was the first style blog I ever stumbled across. Thank you, Patti!

Sorry, I've had to photoshop here because I have yet to fix my lighting problem, but the colours are pretty accurate.

You can see the brass fittings in the far right photo, and O made the slits in the top for the strap to go through.