Paillettes, the new alternative energy

"Fill 'er up!" glug glug glug (sound of drinking)

"Aaaah, much better."

That's an actual photo below. Just this sliver of light hitting the alley just right. You should see my elevator when I climb aboard in this jacket. It's like a mega mini disco partay. Woo hoo! Going to get frozen corn! But those moves are nothing compared to when I go buy broccoli.

It was stellar day for photos. Rain? Sun? Rain? Sun? The sky couldn't make up its mind, so I happily chased shadows and light in this alley with my tripod.

I adore these vintage palazzo pants, fully lined, with an aligned pattern at the front as well - I love those details. I bought them a couple of years ago for a song because they needed some TLC. So glad to do it! And I finally took them in. The paillette jacket, a favourite, is from My Sister's Closet.

The elevator may be Bee Gees but these photos remind me of that song: "Blinded by the light, racked up like a douche, like a roller in the night." Heh. It was written by Bruce Springsteen, but below is the Manfred Mann version, 1975, which I prefer.

Of course I had to wear my big blue sunglasses as well. Guaranteed if you wear paillettes you're going to have a great day. Well, kind of a guarantee. I'm going to look for paillette pants now, although they'd crunch when I sit down, or a paillette trench coat. How cool would that be?! Silver. Paillette go-go boots! No paillette underwear though. Just no.

If I could do that kick with rollerskates, I'd think I have real talent. 

I'm not much more than a paillette top half and a paisley palazzo'ed bottom half. That's the way, uh hunh, uh hunh, I like it, uh hunh, uh hunh. You don't know how lucky you are that you can't hear me!

Now I've got a full tank, I'm ready to rumble!!! Just don't touch my threads. Or my hair. Or my sunglasses. Or my body. Or my brownie. Okay, maybe not rumble. How about let's just hang out?  

In other news, I was in Refinery29, talking about style rules; my bit is here. You know how I feel about those, don't you? It's so cool that they asked me, along with six other women. It's funny reading my answers in that context. It's like there's a little megaphone attached to the end of my pen. I can't help myself. Hahaha!!  

And I was in ELLE (Brazil), InStyle (Greece), WhoWhatWear, and Metro.style (Philippines). These are a few since January - I don't keep up very well. And thank you SO MUCH for all your cheering of my Montecristo piece. 

I also met up with Sheila and L in Vancouver this week. We had a blast! Make sure you go to Sheila's blog, Sheila Ephemera, for her Big Ass Weekend Roundup. It's going to be a good one. (She has included photos of this paillette jacket on our meetup day too.) She's been blogging for ten years now. Huge congratulations on that!

L also has a blog, Creative Maelstrom, which has been going strong since 2009. Like Sheila, he is a gifted writer, but his specialty is CD reviews.

That's Sheila and L below, always super styling. I took this photo at Fluevog shoe emporium. They should be gifted shoes for life for their support of the brand. 

I'm linking up with Patti for Visible Monday at Not Dead Yet Style and Catherine at Not Dressed as Lamb for #iwillwearwhatilike. 

Until next time. Dress up (well, only if you want to of course) and be fabulous (not an order because I already know you're fabulous). 

Crimson rose petal coat and the big red bag dress

I can't stop wearing red. Bright SCREEAMING red. A young, well-dressed man downtown said to me today, "That's a really red outfit." I said, "Why, yes, it is." Man: You really stand out. Me: I suppose I do. Man: That looks great! Me: Thank you. And then he resumed talking to his imaginary friend.

This dress is size 4, designed to be baggy, which I ADORE. I love the really long sleeves and how the neckline plunges to the waist. As sneer guard, I wore a black camisole with a lacy red slip on top of it. And those are my combat boots, designed to combat boredom and anchor big dresses. They tromp most satisfactorily.

The vintage, crimson rose petal opera coat is from my fairy vintage mother, Su. Mwah!! And Sam, manager of My Sister's Closet, directed me to this dress, which at the time was a crumpled red ball of fabric but she knew I'd love the colour. Oh so right! (The dress was wrinkled because it had just come in and not been steamed yet.)

That's all I have for you this week. Better than nuthin' I hope. Of course I'll link up to Patti at Not Dead Yet Style for Visible Monday and Catherine at Not Dressed as Lamb for #iwillwearwhatilike. I hope my business cards come this week so I can finally be real.

PS - My Sister's Closet is throwing a fundraiser comedy night in Vancouver on Sep. 20 at VanCity Theatre, featuring Mike MacDonald and Melanie Rose. Proceeds go to Battered Women's Shelter Services. Details are here. 

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Edit: A huge smooch to Shelley of Forest City Fashionista for including me in her list:

"8 of the Coolest Outfits Worn by 40+ Bloggers this Month" 

She wrote it to balance out the lists on Bloglovin' where only young mainstream women count. It's an honour to be included among these creative, independent-minded women. 

Howl, prowl, smowl - outfits for hunting and avenging

I'm feeling feisty. I like that word - agitated, prickly, energetic. So I dropped myself into a spinning tunnel of love and flowers and intrigue and lightning wearing my Emma Peel/Avengers outfit, which I bought when I was shopping with Suzanne during her visit to Vancouver. Shopping with her always brings out my inner Zoolander. She put a photo on her Instagram when I tried it on - HERE.

This is wool, rear zip, vintage, and clearly groovy, made by Gordi of Montreal. With the cooler morning weather I could finally wear it. I definitely need a soundtrack when I go on top secret spy missions in this outfit. The colour defies digitization. Contrary to what you see here, this is a screaming, SCREEEEAMING, orangy-red.

The next photo was taken in the anteroom of our squash court.

Below is the photo I put on Instagram. I use my finger as a gun, a noodly one. The only thing I could stop with that would be, uh, candy floss. But I think the world would be a better place if suddenly every gun turned into a noodle and every bullet turned into candy floss. We would become a pasta-loving planet high in carbs and sugar with a huge number of wealthy dentists. And I'd make my millions opening a tomato sauce factory.

I got lots of fun Zoolander poses. Snap, snap, snap, snap, snap - that's what happens when you're a high-action heroine.

And carrying on the theme below... In fact I wore this sexay number a few days before that first one. Guh - could you even imagine a garment so deluxe in your wildest dreams? Again, "SOUNDTRAACK!!" I scream like screamy Frau Farbissina from Austin Powers. Another outfit designed for pouncing.

Pao, author of the blog Project Minima, gave me this piece of divinity at the blogger meetup in Vancouver last summer. It was sewn by her mother many years ago and I am honored to carry on her spirit through style.

While I was on my inspiration walk wearing this, a driver on a busy street screeched to a stop at the curb to shout, "THAT IS THE BEST OUTFIT I'VE EVER SEEN!" Bwahaha. Of course I launched into the story of Pao and her mum and the blogger meetup while cars pulled around her.

This vintage extravaganza consists of a jersey front-zip onepiece with a matching button-up quilted overskirt. A big rhinestone is nested in the center of each button. Note the golden silky lining and the matching quilted tie belt. So utterly fabulous.

I'll link something here up with Patti at Visible Monday, Not Dead Yet Style, and Catherine at #iwillwearwhatilike, Not Dressed as Lamb.

This outfit brought out my scowl/smile, known as a smowl, rhymes with howl and prowl. I was imagining a roar. Don't forget, I was alone in a parking lot making these faces for my tripod, but mere meters away from a busy sidewalk - proof of how professionally aloof I am to the seething reality around me. It's is a special skill, yesh.

This post is tardy. I am tardy. Pffft. Can't be helped. (smowl)

Usually when people express interest in my style, at the end of a conversation I might shove a crumpled bit of napkin with my blog addressed scratched into it with a blotty pen. Sooo professional. So I finally ordered real cards. Now my life will be perfect.

I've photographed other outfits since my last post too, which you can see on Instagram HERE. You don't have to join IG to look. And you can search for things that interest you, e.g., paisleypants. When you click a photo, it pops up bigger. Also, if you sign up with Instagram, you will be able to comment, and you don't need a cell phone to do that. So that's a little FYI. I'd put them here but this post would be too long.

I hope you're all having a stellar life at the moment! If not, HANG ON!!! I'll send Emma ASAP with her noodle gun and candy floss maker. If only life were so easy...

Pantsuits, white hair gel, and chest coolers

I should be singing. Something '80s.

It feels like autumn and I am enamoured with suits, jacket/trousers, with a tie or huge plastic flowers pinned to the lapel.  And stark white shirts, spray starched - you can almost hear the fabric crack with each elbow bend. Maybe this fixation comes from the back-to-school air, the words uniforms, regimentation, thinking caps, and pencils. 

This suit is an indulgence. An Emporio Armani vintage set, made in Italy, thrifted. I watched it for weeks in the shop without much interest. And then one day I tried it on. By happenstance, there was a new white men's shirt in the change room at the same time. I bought them both. And the next week I found the tie. I'm in grey.

A season of lines - straight, crooked - and unpredictability. A woman in a suit also zigzags definitions. Not blurred lines so much as smudged and messy, peskily impure for slotting pegs in boxes. Of all the clothes I have ever worn, nothing has elicited more hostility from men than the pantsuit. To that I say, with a jaunty flip of my coat flap - kiss my pantsuit ass. 

In my hair I've put Manic Panic white hair gel. Seriously, it coats your hands - and hair - like paint, but it washes out. I love the subtle effect on my grey. What's great about this gel is it allows me to play with colour without the commitment of a dye. Today I bought a small tube of blue - about $12 Cdn. I'll let you know how it goes. (Not sponsored)

And below, another farking project.

My alien/marshmallow/panda/anime/ghosty/crow shirt. And boob cooler. And just-in-case-I-suddenly-get-implants shirt. And instead of white hair, I did white eyebrows (slightly blue) and nude lipstick. So pale, so pale, waiting for the ship to beam me up and away to the jelly planet.

I've heard it's a thing to pose like you've just taken your finger out of your mouth. Uh, I won't do it again. I met up with Sue of A Colourful Canvas this week and she taught me another trending pose where you just droop open one side of your mouth. Oooh, sexay! Hahaha!!! We both laughed trying that one out. Sorry, no photos! But people in the cafe may have been alarmed. 

I'm linking to Patti, Visible Monday, Not Dead Yet Style, and Catherine, #iwillwearwhatilike, Not Dressed as Lamb. 

So what's up with you? Think you'll try that gel? Or the sexy droopy mouth pose? Show us! Hahaha.

My silent movie

Where's my classic Rolls Royce? I feel like a '20s film star in this get-up. Well, it's not actually a get-up; it's a get-it-on, get-down, get-with-it, get-goin', gettin'-real kind of outfit, not a costume, even though everything we put on lends us character. 

Fashion rule: It is perilous to wear a large magnifying glass pendant on a sunny day because
it may burn a hole in one's torso, which is never an attractive fashion statement. With winter sun I stayed intact.

If I were a Hollywood star, in this outfit I'd definitely have been photographed in, say, New York, as I'm dressed far too warmly for Beverly Hills. I'm wearing my thrifted midi length made-in-France wool knit turtleneck dress, which features a hood and gold lurex thread decorative seaming, and my impossibly amazing faux fur maxi coat, which I bought on consignment. If I was really a star, those yellow diamonds wouldn't be from a thrift pile in East Vancouver either.

My imaginary agent, director, manager, and publicist would probably all be screaming at me that I'm getting a bit long in tooth for my imaginary profession, in which case I'd have to tell them to feck off and then build my own studio empire and distribution network where all female actors, whose falling "fuckability" quotients (from ruling misogynist eyes) have kicked them out of the system, will find a new lucrative home. Woe betide those who underestimate women's power of the grey - that's something real.

I have no script; I'm better when I improvise. Or maybe I just haven't stumbled across the right script yet. Clearly, not having a script at all doesn't give me much chance of finding a good or a bad one. Nunh. But one outfit certainly brings up lots of ideas and dreams which I scrawl down here maybe a day or hours before I post.

And...

MY SILENT MOVIE: 

BAG AND A BERET CHECKS HER BLOG READING LIST

I have made a little Silent Movie that shows me reading the blogs I follow, which I had been thinking about for a while. Sooo much ended up on the cutting room floor. Heheheh. I just wish it wasn't such a pain to remove the makeup. I hope you enjoy this.

No ears or fingers were harmed in the making of my video. And don't worry - I used an old computer. I use a big trough, designed for animals long in tooth, while I'm browsing on my regular machine. Below is a still taken from the video with shadow added around the edges. It fits my mood. 

With this windswept-style hair I often feel like I'm in a commercial selling high-end stereo equipment. Very empowering, but who buys stereos any more? Which consumer products do you feel like you're selling with your hair style?

That's all from here. I'll link something up with Patti at Not Dead Yet Style for Visible Monday and with Catherine at Not Dressed at Lamb for #iwillwearwhatilike when they go live. These linkups are great motivators for me to organize myself at least once a week. Thank you, Patti and Catherine!

My hat malfunctioned

OOPs. I had a post here with a grey faux fur hat I bought in a vintage store. I loooved it! Its construction was exquisite. But there were starting to be references to it as an afro on Instagram, and while they were all supportive - thanks for your comments, by the way - I was startled because I saw it in the vein of the huge fur hats you used to see around.

I would never wear an afro wig so I can't wear a hat that is seen as afro hair either. It was bad judgment on my part not to have a wider vision about how it would come across - I get caught up in my little vibe. That's why I removed the post.

But onwards and upwards. I have a lot more cool stuff to wear and post about that will hopefully bring joy to all!! I'll be back soon!! Hee hee.

I have also removed my Instagram account. I couldn't delete the hat photo so I just took down my whole account. Bwhaha! No big deal.

I'm not sure when/if I'll be back, but it was a ride! THANK YOU for your support!!

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!DRAMA QUEEN UPDATE!

I got my Instagram back! Sylvia (40+ Style) saved me. She removed that photo for me and reset everything. It's a miracle. I'm deeply thankful. 

Lessons? 
I shouldn't start pressing buttons if I don't know what will happen. In fact, I set Instagram to take a temporary break, not delete everything, but when everything disappeared I figured, okay, whatever.

AND, try to think about other people's perceptions about what I'm wearing before I trot it out into the wide open world. It's better to be more sensitive in advance than have regrets later.

So...
THE RIDE CONTINUES!!! Thank you for your patience. Hahaha! Pass me another drink, would ya? And keep 'em coming.

For the record, nobody was critical of my hat in their comments. The comments were awesome!! You are all awesome!! As suggested, yes, I think I can repurpose the hat into something else.

Henceforth, this shall be known as the Great Hat Fiasco.

Most Joyful Nature Woman in a hot pink gown

How many more opportunities would I have to fark around the park in this stellar gown before it gets too cold? So I seized the day to create a fairy tale of sorts, wearing hot pink instead of red.

For a romantic reading of this photo, my dress is caught on brambles, not a stick, the sprayer is a lantern, and that's an enchanted forest, not Stanley Park, Vancouver.

I was afraid a ranger or a Mountie - not quite a prince but still on horseback - would find me and arrest me for spraying bug killer in a public park. It was in fact water, but even watering is prohibited with restrictions still in place from the drought. For art, I risked it. 

I made a short video, about 40sec, of me communing joyfully with nature. It's called:

MOST JOYFUL NATURE WOMAN

As I romped through the woods laughing and jumping and skipping, I noticed a canopy of little spiders swinging lazily mid-air on invisible threads, watching me, itching to nest in my hair. A squirrel came to watch as well. 

Hikers on the nature trail nearby would have cocked their heads in amazed wonder upon hearing the rare cry of a-hahaha-ha, accompanied by flashes of hot pink plumage. I could almost hear the flurrious flipping of pages in their guides to rare birds. 

This special old dress is past her prime for forest frolics, at least with Miu Miu heels, but she was still a star, despite the teensiest rrrip sounds every few minutes (even more alarming than the spiders), and my boots kept getting caught in the hem as I clumsily negotiated stumps and roots on a forest floor slippery with damp pine needles. Gentle tending is required. I shall happily do it.

Below, getting serious. This is how all big-time movie directors look. Gaffer! Where's my gaffer!? More importantly, where's my fecking spider wrangler!!

After the shoot, I wore this dress out for my morning coffee, as originally planned. I've posted this gown previously, here; she billows with playful elegance and a sibilant swish. My Miu Miu boots keep her grounded - too grounded it turned out. Everything I'm wearing is thrifted or a gift. 

Feeling quite pleased with my impromptu escapade on this crisp summer day, I drew a couple of Turnip Heads to celebrate whilst nursing my splendid Italian roast. 

No animals were harmed in the making of this video, except my pride. If you had a chance to watch, I hope you liked it as much as I had fun making it. I love the process; I love the resulting evidence.

I'm linking this up to Patti's Visible Monday at Not Dead Yet Style when it goes live on Sunday. She's baaaack! Hurrah!! I look forward to seeing you all there again.

And I'll link to Catherine's new #iwillwearwhatilike at Not Dressed as Lamb when it goes live Monday because by chance I am also wearing sheer, her prompt for the week. Thanks, Catherine!

I woke up this morning (next day) with hair that looked like Einstein dressed like a Bay City Roller for Halloween. It's a look - yeah, look away. Okay, bye. Have a great weekend, everyone!!

Friends wigging out, and Hat Attack

Hat Attack! 

This is my contribution to Judith's excellent Hat Attack #26 on Style Crone. I've worn this straw hat before for Hat Attack but not with these zingy clothes. Blam! A blast of sunshine!! The sunglasses and pants are new to me and the belt has been in regular rotation lately. 

AND - 

At the 40+ blogger meetup in Vancouver in July, Shawna of The Director of Awesome invited the last women standing - Sheila of Ephemera, Sylvia of 40+ Style, and me - to her room for a little pyjama party after the jazz bar. We were determined to stretch out the merriment for at least one more hour. 

Of course I brought my satchel of wigs. As we know, wigs are to a blogger photo shoot what monkey bars are to a playground. Here are a few of the shots I took - I messed with them slightly to enhance a particular mood. Aren't these women stunning?! 

Above, Shawna, quintessential woman of the '60s. I love this long-legged sophisticate look. In her hand is a blue wig (also on Sylvia later), but in black and white you might think it's Fifi (or a tribble). She's wearing a faux fur stole, also from my bag, and those are the ties hanging off the bed.

Sheila is the best sex kitten! She is a fearless model and I had to be quick to keep up. She looked spectacular in every wig and every shot.

"The Supermodel." Sylvia put on "Fifi" and then wrapped the fur stole around it. I never would have thought of it. She was a natural in front of the camera but I'm not showing you all of the photos I took, except to say we laughed a lot.

Below are Sheila's pink bossy pants - she calls them that. I love her confidence but I don't think she's bossy - that would be me with my camera. 

If you hang around me with my wigs and camera, you're bound to end up in compromising situations. Of course, I obtained permission from everyone here to post these photos. And thank you, Shawna, for being such a mod, gracious hostess. 

I feel like a cat who nonchalantly drops dead birds and other little animals at my human's doorstep when I post unexpected photos and videos. You are summoned by my meowing, poke at my offering to see if it's still alive, and think, oh, she's been at it again, as you watch me saunter away. 

Which brings me to this.
Sheila sent me three pairs of shoes during her closet overhaul: Fluevog (correction: Gold Button, but I love them like Vogs) booties, heeled granny shoes, and sandals from the Mountains of Italy! Her gift inspired this 30sec video.

I had some cool footage from an outing on an elevated train so I wanted to play with green screen. The sound is poor but it's betta' than nuttin' ya sorry mutts. Heh. Thank you, Sheila!!

Have a great weekend, everyone, as if you need me to tell you. It's a long one here with Labour Day on Monday. I'm so jealous of those dames having a meetup with Sylvia in New York. Ya wise guys!

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Edit: I just found out that Catherine of Not Dressed as Lamb has a new Link-up thingy under the theme "I Will Wear What I Like" in response to hideous style rules for women over 30. Thirty? Bwahahaha!! For me dressing is as much a political act as a statement of aesthetic preference, so I shall wear exactly what I please.

"Use it or lose it"

We must cherish our right to freedom of expression 

and not be cowed by cows

Catherine's last round was only for Instagrammers but she has broadened it to include blog posts as well, so I'm goin'! - at least this time because I happen to meet this week's theme: Colour. 

Maybe I'll see you there. 

Vintage Swimsuit Edition

Why is this woman laughing? Because she grew a bust overnight by way of a vintage Jantzen swimsuit, size 14, with built-in vertical-wired cups and Reebok sock fillers. Yes, my new favourite swimsuit, care of Pao of Project Minima and her mother who used to wear it, from the clothing swap at our recent blogger meetup. Oh thank you, Pao!! I feel like a schtar! "Oh daarling, that's faaaabulous." 

The features of the suit that I love most are the zip up the back and the leg openings that don't choke my thighs, not to mention that it's, gulp, super-fecking-amazing in general. There's a button missing on the left side, but nobody looks at the boobal area anyway. [Edit: As Pao pointed out in the comments, there's only supposed to be one button - it's designed that way. And now I love it even more!]

I'm feeling fierce here, channeling Swindon. My reading glasses are, of course, for reading a steamy paperback novel whilst reclining on my lounger and sipping a strawberry margarita poolside at the Beverly Hills Hilton. Right, Anne?

I'm employing the Sheila stair pose. My angle should be a bit more acute to achieve maximum results. I have yet to master the Corey hand (details on that HERE, Sheila Ephemera's blog).

I heard that exchange in a coffee shop a few months ago. Her reply was serious, no camp or sarcasm at all. I've always wondered how my life would be different if I were a person like that.

Switching drinks. "Who took my champagne? My yacht is waiting. Cannes is waiting!" I did a mini shoot in the morning with flat hair, above, but this suit demanded something more dynamic so I did a shoot last night with sproinged hair and flatforms. Love that plateau of hair, although I'm not sure what to make of the foothills on my chest.

Smoke and mirrors and wires and socks, my friends, although I would say I am more comfortable in this swimsuit than the one I wear now. The fabric is not too squeezy and I can move without bits creeping up my buttoxil area. Faaaabulous wire definition. 

And guess what? I did wear the suit out already. Last night. At 11pm. I locked myself in the concrete box so I had to go down to the sidewalk and ring O to let me in. And guess what? O didn't answer. He was playing with a new machine. No problem. I figured I could hang out in the dark deserted park in my swimsuit with my camera. GAAAA! I called again. Thankfully he heard and beeped me in; otherwise, these photos would have been much, much more interesting.

That's me when I got home, sweaty-faced because I was just a touch PANICKING!! HEEELP!!! I'll never forget my keys again. Maybe. 

I'm enjoying reading the wrap-up posts from the blogger meetup. Thanks again for coming! Life is getting back to routine and I am recommencing my blogger rounds bit by bit. Everyone who didn't come has been so patient. Mwah!!! Missed you. I have to see what you've been up to!!